HeatCageKitchen

Happy Easter, Passover, Bunny Day, and Sunday!

March 31, 2013 Amy

Hello, Dear Readers:

As I’ve said a few times, I’m a Buddhist, since 1986. Therefore, Easter, Passover, and most other holidays aren’t part of my individual faith. However. . .that doesn’t mean I ignore them, especially if there’s food involved. I mean, why? No need to be rude if someone offers you a macaroon or king cake or something. . . .

Is your church group doing something for Easter? Egg hunt, having an Easter Bunny on hand, or maybe some other kind of spring-related celebration? Bet you’re not having the Easter Bunny jump out of an airplane. Well, someone is. . .and it’s a man who teaches Navy SEALS to jump out of planes, in a bunny suit. I mean. . .that’s a manly man you do NOT argue with, OK? He can kick your butt wearing that bunny suit, and you will address him as “Sir.”

Anyway. . .

I grew up Catholic. Didn’t meet anyone Jewish until I went to college. At Loyola in New Orleans. What I know about kosher is what folks have told me over the years (and the bits I’ve seen on TV), like what kosher salt is really for. (Of course I use it–doesn’t everybody?) I’ve never been to a synagogue. The only reason I know about Rugelach is because they’re in Barefoot Contessa Parties on page 69.

I mean absolutely no disrespect to anyone who is Jewish. I am only proclaiming my lack of information about Judaism, particularly as it relates to the culinary arts. Nothing more, I promise!

Imagine my thoughts when I came across Raspberry Rugelach. I saw them in Central Market on Friday, and I *almost* got some, but. . .it had wheat flour in it. Raspberries in dough? Oh, yes. . .but are they kosher for Passover with flour in them? I asked the lady next to me if she was Jewish. Well, if she was, then she would have known if the rugelach was kosher. But she wasn’t, and she didn’t. Maybe next year. The cream cheese threw me off–I thought to be kosher for Passover it couldn’t have flour. Maybe that’s Hannukah or Yom Kippur. Again, I’m the *last* person to ask about that sort of thing; I was just hoping for no flour.

In the same book on page 176: Apple Crostata, a delicious dessert that’s good any time of year. (It too has wheat, in the form of flour.) I’ve never had anyone turn it down. Me included. Hey–it’s for special occasions. I’ve taken it to Thanksgiving a couple of times, and to a birthday party once–there is rarely any left. I think a couple of years ago I had one slice left and gave it to my neighbor, who finished it off quickly and enjoyed it as much as everyone else did.

Now, Easter is also wonderful, because there are chocolate bunnies and chocolate eggs and chocolate, well, everywhere. YUM! And those chocolate eggs filled with peanut butter? I’ve craved those once or twice (but not in a while.) I’m trying to stay away from sugar/carbs as much as I can; but sometimes, only chocolate will do. Like this, for instance, found in Central Market on Monday:

Chocolate sold by the pound at Central Market

YEAH, BABY!!

I don’t remember the brand, but I can tell you it’s fancy, possibly from France. This weighed at least 2 pounds and was nearly the size of a brick. This is not a candy bar. Well, not in the traditional sense, but it is for me. Trust me when I tell you I sent this picture to my neighbor, and I was SOOO tempted! this brick is about $10, if I remember correctly; might have been $15. She texted back, “Don’t.” I didn’t. But I thought about it real hard. That’s a lotta chocolate, and even Giada de Laurentiis would be hard pressed to resist.

If someone left that in my Easter basket, I’d be all over it. And I’d put it in a locked safe, too. IT’S MINE!!!

Now, a couple of years ago, I was on a business trip in Washington, DC. Yes, the nation’s capital. There were six of us–four from Houston, one from Florida, and one from California, a younger bloke we sort of tortured a bit. We were walking around somewhere and had dinner in a nice restaurant and dessert in a gelato shop. However, we passed a little shop I found out later was called Edibles Incredible, a DC favorite. I couldn’t resist a little more chocolate (I think I had sugar free), but I had to go back in when I saw this baby:

Peeps Sculpture, May 2011, Edibles Incredible, Washington, DC

Yes, dear readers, those are hundreds, if not thousands, of marshmallow Peeps, in what one might call a “sculpture,” or as they called it, a “display.” Whatever you call it, that’s a lotta Peeps. OMG. I’m not a particular fan of them, but I HAD to take that picture.

It was absolutely gorgeous, and about 10 or 15 feet high. Heck, I didn’t measure it, but it was way taller than my five-foot-three frame. It was huge–and it was a little bitty store! I forget what kind of chocolates I bought, but it was just a couple, and of course, handmade and very delicious.

Speaking of Easter. . .my mother used to tell the story that her engagement ring was a true surprise hidden in a chocolate Easter bunny, and she nearly threw it away. Whoops. . .fortunately, somehow, a very expensive diamond ring (very 1950’s) was saved and the folks got married some time after that. They’ve been married something like 55 years now.

It’s been many years since I’ve had a chocolate Easter bunny, much less an Easter basket, but that’s OK. Sometimes when I’m having a day. . .only some chocolate will do, you know?

And on Monday, all the Easter candy goes on sale 50% off. The thrifty mother will have a secret freezer to stash them in so that the kids don’t know when she bought it. The chocoholic will simply go shopping and make himself or herself very happy.

I’m going to try and behave myself.

Happy Easter, Passover, and Happy Dining!

Considered opinions,Cookbooks,Desserts,Holidays,Ingredients,Special Occasions

Macchiato Saturday Night!

March 30, 2013 Amy

Happy Saturday Night, Dear Readers:

Well, as I described in my last post, I have fallen in love with Starbucks’ Hazelnut Macchiato, a drink best described as a liquid hazelnut-flavored candy bar. Much as I enjoyed it and want more, but am not paying $3.50 for a 200-calorie sugary coffee drink. Not for a while yet. (No, I don’t want YOU to buy me one, either.) And besides, I’m still reading Wheat Belly, and want to avoid sugar as much as I can. . .sometimes I don’t. After seeing the term “non-alcoholic fatty liver disease,” or NAFLD, and its graphic description, I figure backing off sugar and being a bit paranoid about it (as well as wheat and soy) is probably a good course of action.This drink is made with a syrup as well as plenty of sugar, so, that’s for a special occasion, just like wedding cake is.

So in my quest for replacing the sugar-laden coffee drink I crave with something less sugary, caloric and less expensive, I put my thinking cap on.

Sometimes that cap is on too tight, but that’s another blog post.

I’ve been using my 12-year-old cappuccino machine a little more lately, and while it doesn’t froth quite the way it used to, I think, it certainly works for my purposes. Besides, when I went looking at new, more modern cappuccino machines, I decided the one I have works just fine.

Why do I have a 12-year-old cappuccino machine? When I was married to what’s-his-name (1996-2001), he got it in his furry little head that we “needed” one. (Where he got ideas like this is beyond me, but it wasn’t the first time, or the last.) I think I bought the first one, but it may have been one of our lovely wedding gifts. He knew how to use the metal kind you put on the stove, but not the electric kind. It fell to me to learn how to use it, and so, I did.

Then one early morning I made a cappuccino to hold me over until the regular coffeepot was finished. It was then that I knew I was truly addicted to caffeine. I’ve been on and off caffeine in the years since, but after my doctor told me to quit last year, I did, because one cup of regular tea in the morning was causing way too many problems.

The original machine was white, and when it finally gave out, I got us another one. Right before we called it quits. So I’ve had it ever since. I use it occasionally, not every day, and only when I have fresh milk. Dunno if almond milk would work, but maybe I’ll try it.

Anyway. . . .

What I came up with was to get some sugar-free hazelnut flavored syrup and see how well it would work. I’ll tell you about that shortly. Really, macchiato means “marked” in Italian, and the drink is simply a shot of espresso with some frothy milk on it, and some syrup or something on top. I got the definition here--it was the first thing that came up when I did a search. So my version is really more of a cappuccino, not so much a macchiato.

So here we go–this is the equipment:

Ready to brew!

Alessi is the only decaf espresso I can find in Houston, and it seems like Central Market is the only place I can find it now. Darnit. The small Torani syrup cam from Cost Plus World Market, so that if didn’t like it, I won’t be stuck with a huge bottle of something I just wanna throw out.

The latte mug is filled with hot water so the coffee and steamed milk stay warm. (I learned THAT the hard way and now do it anytime I make coffee.) The milk pitcher was taken out of the freezer just for this picture and went back in when I was finished shooting it. So while the milk is getting really chilled, I turned on the machine (that knob on the upper left.) And so after a few minutes of listening to some really weird noises, the brew process started:

As you can see, there is a third mark in the middle that indicates when to flip the knob around so that you can froth milk. Once the dark brew starts going down into the pot, it happens pretty fast. When the pot fills up to that point (just over 2 cups), it’s time to froth milk:

Please pardon my hard-workin’ dishpan hands. Like the very nice Ree Drummond, The Pioneer Woman, I am always in need of hand cream. Remember, idle hands are the Devil’s workshop.

Mine froths milk pretty good, but it doesn’t seem to be as frothy as it used to. Of course, you could have other problems more important than this one. (Yes, I do.) Up until recently if you put your hand under there instead of milk, it would not only blow very hot air very hard, you would move your hand because it would get burned. Now, not so much. But it still froths milk pretty good.

Yeah, I worry about this kind of thing from time to time. Keeps me from worrying about bigger, scarier stuff.

So when the milk is frothed to perfection, I dump out the hot water (usually back in the kettle for tea later) and then pour the steamed milk into the cup, holding back the foamy part with a big soup spoon. Just like they do in Starbucks, except I’ve never worked there. Usually I do that and put in my accoutrements (3 packets of pink stuff and frequently a drop of vanilla extract) first, but if not, I add it at this stage. In this case, I added two tablespoons of the hazelnut syrup, but I think three would have been perfect. When the espresso is finished brewing, I dump that in, then put the frothy milk on top, using a rubber spatula to get all of it out of the pitcher.

Have you ever tasted frothed milk? Then you’ll know why.

Now, most cappuccino aficionados sprinkle ground cinnamon or ground nutmeg on top of the frothy milk. Not me. Used to do that and one day decided to go all Giada and sprinkle cocoa powder on top. So Drs. Frasier and Niles Crane can fuss all they like at the Cafe Nervosa. . .me and Giada will be chillin’ with chocolate.

What you get looks like this:

Yes, that cup describes one of my philosophies. It also makes me a hypocrite because I have an unfinished fall/winter suit hanging up, and another one to make. I should have finished those by now and working on the “some other time” small projects. It’s March, I should be making spring stuff. Stitch ’em up, move ’em out, you know? I have a Donna Karan suit that’s been waiting to be made for three years now. But at least the cup reminds me I can go back to it any time I want.

Anyway. . .

How does it taste? Well, not EXACTLY like the one from Starbucks, but it’s a pretty good substitute that I can be happy with. The Torani syrup contains Splenda, which is something I normally avoid because of its chemical composition, and I’ll try another hazelnut flavoring without sugar, sucralose or aspartame in it.

So if you’re considering having something a little different, you are welcome to use my example and follow my blazed trail. Cappuccino really is good, and so I’m glad I have a machine to make it with, and I’ll consider adding different flavorings if I can find them easily.

Meantime, I’ve got to go wash up my cappuccino machine.

Happy Dining!

Considered opinions,Drinks of all kinds,Health & Wellness,Ingredients,Special considerations

Marigold, curry and heaven in a cup

March 26, 2013 Amy

Good day, Dear Readers:

So far, today, I’ve screamed at my computer four times. We’ll see how long it takes to do it again. Some days I dream of throwing all three laptops up against the wall and watching them smash into a million pieces. But with the walls around here, I’m sure just the case will be broken and nothing will happen. Nightmare: the damn things will still work. So I walked my neighbor’s dog and forgot it for a while. He’s a pretty good pug. He listens and doesn’t offer opinions. He does bark if we pet another dog in his presence, though. He did that with an adorable little German shepherd puppy today.

This past weekend, I watched a fantastic film, The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel. Although it’s on HBO now, I requested the DVD from the library. In October. I kid you not. I’ll return it tomorrow, since there are a thousand other folks requesting it in Harris County. I’ve watched it twice so that I could enjoy it and see a little more in it than I did the first time. This is a wonderful film that has one–I repeat, ONE–instance of the “F” word (not “food”) towards the end, when Dev Patel screams it at the brother of his girlfriend. There is also some “nudity”–consisting of one guy’s bare feet and one of the female leads is topless. When I say “topless,” I mean you see her bare shoulders. Sonny’s girlfriend gets naked, takes off her shoes, and you see her back, but not anything else. That’s it. You don’t see full frontal anything here.

I would say these are “adult situations,” only because I don’t think anyone under 30 or 40 will appreciate this movie. But that’s just me, some twenty-somethings might actually like it, too.

My trick for catching all the dialogue: turn on the closed-captioning, especially if it’s a British film, since you might not catch everything without it. I happen to know what PG Tips is (regular British tea that will knock your socks off, they also a very delicious Decaf), as well as Chocolate Hobnobs (although I’ve never had those.) Pickled eggs and pickled onions, I just don’t get.

In honor of their first night at the hotel, manager Sonny (Dev Patel’s character) has his kitchen prepare “Roast Goat Curry.” Um, what? These are British seniors, not accustomed to the exotic spices and curries of India. And, well, you’ll see how they deal with it. Judi Densch’s character starts naming off the different dishes that are a bit confusing to nearly all of them.

Don’t look at me. I once had a shrimp curry in a British-style pub in Delray Beach, FL. That was good, but the time before that I made beef curry. . .well, let’s just say curry doesn’t agree with me. But Suzanne Somers has a great chicken curry recipe in one of her books that I do like.

The Best Exotic Marigold Hotel is a very, very good film. Go see it, or get the DVD from RedBox, or on demand, or catch it on HBO. Here’s a couple of “spoilers:” despite a couple of predictable things, it has a happy ending, and you will be glad you watched it. It’s a long film, but worth your time if you want to see a really GOOD movie.

That being said. . . .

I was one busy kitty cat yesterday, and in my busy day I made time to head over to Starbucks to use a coupon I got last week for a free coffee. Actually, not *just* a free coffee, but a Hazelnut Macchiato. See, when you have a registered Starbucks card–really, just a standard gift card that you use in a Starbucks to get coffee and food and refill–you get coupons for stuff occasionally, as well as a free drink of your choice on your birthday. (They started those back in the day when they charged for Internet access; now it’s free.) Last year I had them make me a large (Grande, I think) decaf latte. That’s a $5 cup of coffee, BTW. They couldn’t give me a second latte, but they did refill the huge cup with decaf drip. Good enough for me. I had free coffee from Starbucks!

Starbucks: Safe Haven With Food.

When I go to Starbucks, it’s not very often, and it’s because I’m out somewhere and I can stop there and get a quick bite or just a coffee. That’s what they do, right? I keep $25 or so on that card just for that purpose. (When I had a boyfriend we’d go in for breakfast; that’s how I started occasionally having their breakfast sandwiches.) You get “stars” every time you stop in and use the card to purchase something, and, well, there are neat things that get emailed to you occasionally. Like a free tall Hazelnut Macchiato.

I have a cappuccino machine at home, (leftover from being married to someone who thought we *should* have one) which I use on occasion when I have cow’s milk around. (Not often, and I don’t know if almond milk would work. Maybe I’ll try it one day.) I know what the foamy milk is like, and having had the occasional latte, I know that too.

This was more than a latte. They even made it decaf for me.

Let me say at this point that the only reason I had a 12 ounce, $3.50 cup of coffee yesterday was because I had a coupon for a free one, the result of having the registered Starbucks card. And that if it were another special occasion (and I had a regular income and could easily afford it) I might also have one. But not very often. It’s what most of us would call a “splurge.”

Oh, yes. . . .

First you taste the light, frothy milk, and then the smoky flavor of hazelnut comes through. Then as you sip farther, the coffee taste comes through, and it melds together in one swirl of heady, tasty components like a multi-flavored syrup. It stayed warm all the way to the bottom with my coffee cup cozy I made (they also sell them at Starbucks for about $5, I make mine from scrap fabrics), and by the time I made my last stop at Vitamin Shoppe, I had the lid off and was licking the mocha colored milk from the inside of the cup while it was upside down so it would drip towards me.

Yup, that’s me, minding my manners. Hey–the kids don’t care, either.

Do note that this “handcrafted coffee drink” is also about 180 calories for the one I had (in addition to being $3.50.) Larger, of course, is more and has more, depending on what they frothed in it and percentages. I mean, they have a formula, but there could be slight differences in each cup (that’s what Starbucks says on their website.) That’s like having a candy bar or even a Larabar, right? So do take that into consideration if you are thinking about trying one.

It’s a splurge, OK? For a special occasion. But that’s just me. You could get fat slurping these down all the time if you’re not careful.

Now, I took a sip at the counter before I left, and the first thing I said was “OMG, that’s so good!” There was a guy standing next to me waiting for his Venti-something-or-other, and he looks at me with a smile and and casually says,

“Is this your first experience with a Hazelnut Macchiato?”

I said yes, it was. Didn’t occur to me til later that this boy actually asked me that question. Looked to be college age, and I figured he was a student at University of Houston Clear Lake (UHCL), since that store is the closest, I think, to the campus. Chatted briefly, then left, since I had other things to do last night.

“Is this your first experience with a Hazelnut Macchiato?”

I still can’t believe someone actually asked me that about a cup of coffee. Gotta admit, there are some pretty nice folks in Starbucks, although I don’t spend that much time in them.

I think it was last year that there was a certain group of people who were boycotting Starbucks on Valentine’s Day because they wouldn’t do something they thought the company should. This went around on Facebook and other social media, so, I made a point of stopping by and getting a panini on the way home for dinner. I told the young barista that I was “boycotting the boycott.” He said I was the third person to tell him that, and it was the busiest day of the year so far!

Also I discovered one day, quite by accident, that if there are more than one baristas wearing those drive-through headsets, they can actually talk to each other ON the headsets without anyone on the outside knowing about it. In fact, I only discovered it because I was watching them while my coffee was being made. No kidding! Watch them while the other barista gets your muffin or heats up that breakfast sandwich for you.

Hey–fun is where you can find it.

Happy Dining!!

Considered opinions,Desserts

The Cooking Garden and Pesto

March 22, 2013 Amy

Hello, Dear Readers:

With the news this week that Twinkies may be returning to store shelves this summer, all of a sudden, I WANT ONE. And a packet of Ding Dongs, too, please. Or, maybe the chocolate cupcakes. Yes, I know what’s in them. I want some. Just once.

It would really be fun to do a side-by-side taste test of the Hostess Twinkies and the new Twinkies and see if they got it right. I hope so. Or there’s gonna be a whole lot of upset sugar junkies in this country. There could be trouble if even one molecule is changed, you know.

Well, it’s been another busy and confusing week here in my neck of the woods, and that time change thing didn’t do me any favors. I’ve been TIRED since last week, and not up to doing anything spectacular. The weather is warming up nicely, and while I have had the patio doors open to get some fresh air this week, I know it’s time to put away the jackets and the wonderful winter boots I bought in 2011 from Lands’ End. I wore them one night last week when I went to the pub to meet a friend of mine. One last time until the fall. Also, they’re flat, so if I get a bit tiddly I won’t fall off of them.

I got a teeny bit tiddly, but didn’t get into any trouble. I promise.

So if in spring, a young man’s heart turns to romance, a young woman’s mind turns to dieting, and what I she’s gonna look like in a bathing suit real soon. While I haven’t dieted in some time, I am thinking about finally getting back to fitness and maybe dropping some of the dreaded excess that seems to follow me around when I’m not careful or get OBE (“Overcome By Events,” an IT technical term.) I found a DVD that I got with the Belly Burner a few years ago and forgot about, called Blazing Abs. (I also forget the Belly Burner frequently.) I would like to start with that one, but I’m kinda tired. To my credit, I have been using my Thighmaster combo, and also managed to get long walks in a couple of times this week. So I’m not entirely sedentary. Just need to be *more* mobile, darnit.

So one of the many things I need to do once I wake up is get on my back patio, dig up the weeds, tidy it up and start planting both in the ground and in the containers. If you’re thinking of elegantly thrown pottery like you see on any of Martha Stewart’s shows, well, keep thinking that, because I use 5 gallon plastic paint buckets.

Currently, I have a smaller plastic pot with mint in it (mostly brown but a few green leaves at the ends), two small planters with green onions in it (more about that in a minute), and one paint bucket with the top off a pineapple in it. I have no idea what’s going on with it, but it’s stuck in there pretty good. Have no idea if it’s growing a pineapple or not, and I’m afraid to dig down there and find out. There’s also rosemary, which seems to grow in desert conditions, because it’s fresh and green and growing like. . .weeds.

Last summer wasn’t a good one after I was laid off, and I pretty much neglected the garden, unfortunately. Amazingly, I still have rosemary and a bit of mint and green onion. I had a bamboo plant that was the living legacy from a coworker that passed on in 2004, but that died pretty quickly. I told them I didn’t want it. I have a small piece of bamboo that’s been growing in a water glass for nearly a year; I might plant it in the same pot, or maybe in the ground. I’d like to get it out of my kitchen, that’s for sure.

One thing I learned from reading Urban Farm magazine and the forums on their companion website is that if you cut off the rooted bottoms of green onions you get from the grocery, you can plant those roots and keep growing them. I bought these at Frohberg’s Farm maybe 3 years ago, and they’re still growing. They’ve gotten a bit skint because I’ve not been faithful in watering them, but I’ve still got some. I’ll have a full pot again soon. Ditto the mint.

Amazingly, the weeds are thriving, even with the little bits of rainfall we’ve had, or rather, NOT had. We’re still kind of in drought conditions here, but I’m hoping for a good rainy season this summer.

I got started growing stuff with the last, um, “relationship” I was in with Blob, since we had plans of eventual country living and food growing. (I still read Hobby Farms and Hobby Farm Home magazines.) I started with the paint buckets and basil. In 2011, I planted things like zucchini and cantaloupe in the ground, along with lettuce and a few other things. Unfortunately, we also had a bad drought that year, and despite my best watering efforts, nothing lasted. I put a small zucchini plant in the ground and it took off, eventually taking up half the plot along with cantaloupe. Then one day, it started to shrivel up. . .and then, no amount of watering would bring it back. There was nothing I could do.

I tried re-growing flat-leaf Italian parsley recently, but nothing sprouted. I’ll try to get me some basil planted soon (preferably organic), and start making some pesto. The sooner I get some basil, the sooner I can whip some up. I LOVE pesto! My favorite recipes is from Giada de Laurentiis’ first book, Everyday Italian, but there are oodles of recipes out there for pesto. Suzanne Somers also has a very tasty recipe for Parsley Pesto in her Appetizers book, which calls for some parsley but a fair amount of basil.

I have one container of pesto left in the freezer from last year. I MUST make more of it this year and freeze lots of it for the winter, darnit.

Of course, my favorite thing to do with that pesto is make Pea Pesto Soup. Had some just this week, with some pesto from the freezer. Admittedly, I can buy fresh pesto already made, but why?

I have hoped to grow sugar snap peas, but I never seem to get around to planting them. Down here in Texas, you have to plant them in like November, because otherwise it’s way too hot. Garlic, too–you buy the bulbs in August, and they have to “over-winter” and you are rewarded in the spring with lovely garden fresh garlic.

I want to grow grape tomatoes. I LOVE grape tomatoes, and those yellow pear-shaped tomatoes, but they’re quite expensive at the grocery store. I planted some in the ground and some in one of those hanging tomato thingies, no luck. Fennel, too–I tried growing that to no avail, along with regular onions and a few other things. No luck.

Soon as I finish a few other things, I’ll be getting out there, probably Sunday, so I can get stuff growing. I admit I’m not the *best* gardener, but eventually, I hope to be picking lots of good stuff from my garden.

One of these days. Tips and comments are welcome, of course. Are you doing the garden this year? If so, what do you want to harvest?

Happy Dining!

Considered opinions,Fresh from the Garden,Ingredients

The Twinkies are coming! The Twinkies are coming!!

March 12, 2013 Amy

Good evening, dear readers:

My apologies for the lack of posts; I’ve been busy. In fact, so busy that I’ve not been able to finish reading my daily Wall Street Journal. I was doing some clicking tonight and discovered two articles on our beloved American snack cakes, Twinkies.

Yes, I’m talking about the return of your Twinkies. From WSJ.com:

Hostess Brands confirmed this afternoon that it has agreed to sell its snack cake business, including that legendary cream-filled yellow cake, to private equity group Apollo Global Management and Metropoulos & Co. The duo will pay $410 million for the brands, five bakeries and some equipment in a deal that now requires a judge’s signature.

Yes, indeed–and we may have them back as soon as this summer. Now, I really want one.

Are you excited yet? I thought I was excited after I got my printer to start working properly again this afternoon. Woo hoo!! I can’t wait to walk into a convenience store and find them so I can try one for the first time since the 1970s!

Hostess Brands has sold not only Twinkies, but also Ho Hos, Ding Dongs and Donettes. (No word on Ziggy yet.) Still not sold are Drake’s cakes, brands Sweetheart, Eddy’s, Standish Farms and Grandma Emilie’s; “stalking horse bids” are being entertained by Hostess for those. Next week’s bankruptcy hearing will request a judge’s approval on the sale of Wonder Bread and other breads to Flowers Foods for $360 million and Grupo Bimbo’s $31.9 million offer for Beefsteak assets.

Is this a great country, or what? Only in America, folks!!

One writer opined about how to sell Twinkies again with more health-conscious Americans reading labels, after the new owner hinted that they might consider updated versions of the chemically laden treats:

That means you could—we repeat, could—one day see low-fat Twinkies. Or whole-wheat Twinkies. Or low-carb Twinkies. Or organic Twinkies.

Sorry. . .what? No, with the legalization of cannabis in a couple of states, anyone with the munchies is just NOT going to care about low-fat, low-carb, whole wheat or “organic Twinkies.” Give me a break.

While I’ve never touched cannabis, I have, on occasion, had a sudden need for something sweet, fast and handy (even if it made me god-awful sick later.) Call it what you like, but in that condition, cannabis or no, a true Twinkies aficionado is going to want the real thing–sugar, flour, cream and all–without a shred of concern for nutritional value.

And, think about it, that’s likely WHY it was such a short time between Hostess’ shutdown and the sale. They KNOW there’s going to be a lot of people in certain states with legally loopy citizens wandering around with the munchies looking for Twinkies, and NOW.

Makes me wish I could have bought it. Or at least a distributorship in each of those states.

Yes, we have war, poverty, strife, a dismal economy, and a thousand other ills. But in America, the greatest country in the world, we’re going to have Twinkies again.

What a country.

Happy Dining!

Considered opinions

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