Archive for the ‘Ingredients’ Category
Good evening, Dear Readers!
Winter hasn’t gotten the memo to knock it off. Atlanta is getting blasted again. It’s cold nearly everywhere.
I am so cold, I put on my one and only pair of long johns to go walk my neighbor’s pug today. I might wear them to bed. As I write this, it’s 36F, and we’ll have a high of 53 tomorrow, if we’re lucky. BRRRRRRRrrrrrrr. . .at least the rain will end.
First, an update from the garden: in addition to the ping-pong sized tomato growing in incredibly cold and wet weather:
Guess I’m getting another one. It won’t get much bigger than that before it starts turning red. And, finally, the radishes are coming!
I read in one of my magazines that radishes are very easy to grow. I found a packet of seeds in the deck box and dug up some dirt. They mature very quickly, although this seems to be taking longer than the 30 days stated in the magazine. That’s OK. I hope neighbors K, R and T like radishes if they really take off. Next time I’d like to try those cute French Breakfast radishes, which are red on top and white on the bottom (root end.)
Now, the mint has come back strong, since we’ve had rain and I’ve watered a few times. One of the main reasons I grow it is so I can make Nigella Lawson’s Corsican Omelette. I thawed out the Goat Cheese from a recent Trader Joe’s trip and beat some eggs. What the recipe says is to fold it in thirds. This time, I finally got it folded!
Then I took it OUT of the pan:
Better luck next time. Hey–it’s EDIBLE, OK? Note: this wouldn’t be a bad thing to split with your honey when you have breakfast in bed, or just breakfast together.
So, onto the news. . . .
This week is Valentine’s Day, and so I thought I would send a few things your way to make your V-D special. No, I can’t help you find the love of your life, or make him/her love you, or bring romance into your life, I can only help with the chocolate part.
Me? No, there isn’t a “someone special.” There isn’t anyone even close to that description. HPD told me to stop dating ’cause they can’t keep coming over to take them away. Restraining orders get expensive, too. My friends have specific instructions if I ever say those words, “I’m getting married.” Let’s see who’s brave enough to carry out a rescue mission.
Yes, I’m exaggerating. A little. But enough about me. . . .
I got an email a little while ago that Starbucks is offering a buy-one-get-one on latte drinks this Friday (February 14th) from 2-5 pm at participating stores. If you don’t know what that means, check out their online primer for lattes. Me, I’d go for the Skinny Flavored Latte with sugar-free hazelnut syrup in it. YUM. A lot less calories than the Hazelnut Macchiato.
Or I could just make myself a cappuccino/latte at home and toss in the hazelnut stuff. My choice, right?
So last year I wrote a post with several chocolate recipes for Valentine’s Day, and it’s still there if you want some. But the one thing that people equate with the day is chocolate covered strawberries. These babies are not in season this time of year, but thanks to expanded agriculture, they are available year round. Sure, they’re expensive, and in many cases very decorated (labor!) That’s all well and good, but if you want to do them yourself, it’s not too difficult. But let me tell you, there’s a trick to it.
Years ago I was talking to my Mom. They’d gone to Ponchatoula, LA to get some strawberries during the season (the best, BTW) and she was attempting to chocolate-cover them. Mom was melting the chocolate and pouring in cold heavy whipping cream. Guess what? The chocolate seized up! I explained that next time, try heating the cream and pouring it into the chocolate, melting it that way. I guess it worked, she never mentioned it again.
If you want to try your hand at it, here are some suggestions from Food Network’s website. Having done this a time or two, you must work fast, since the chocolate will firm up quickly. Don’t burn the chocolate, use parchment or wax paper, and don’t make a mess, please.
Now, last year I told you about the ex-boyfriend who, when we lived together, got sick with me for Valentine’s Day. A couple of weeks ago I was on the phone with him, and just for fun, I said, “Hey, what are we doing for Valentine’s Day?” I was joking of course, but he sort of took it differently. Next thing I know, I’m cooking dinner for him again! Well, he can’t make it this week, and I wouldn’t have done what I did for Christmas, but I would certainly make him something tasty, complete with dessert.
Tonight on Facebook, Joey Jones posted a short “survival guide” for us singles on Valentine’s Day. Pretty good, and if you’re sad about being single. . .don’t be.
Now, about 5 years ago, I think, I went to a “single girl Valentines dinner party,” and I brought dessert. Not just any dessert–a Chocolate Raspberry Pavlova that went over VERY well. As I’ve mentioned before, chocolate and raspberry are my favorite combination, and I’d knock over Shaquille O’Neill to get to it. But in this case, I was good, and they wouldn’t let me take home what was left. I baked it in a heart shape, which is easy to do since it’s meringue. While I don’t have a picture of it anymore, it came out perfect, and looked like this (but heart shaped.)
Nigella Lawson’s Chocolate Raspberry Pavlova from Forever Summer. VERY good choice for many occasions
That will amaze friends and family alike. And–guess what? Bonus–it’s gluten free! No kidding–no flour or anything like it, although there is sugar, so you’d have to take that into consideration if your honey is diabetic. (There’s always Somersweet.)
If the chocolate-raspberry route isn’t for you, there’s also Nigella’s Cappuccino Pavlova, but that has corn flour in it, which I think is what we call corn starch, so it’s got a bit of a flour-like substance in it.
You know, I didn’t mean to turn this into the Nigella column, but I guess I did.
Whether you hang with friends or camp in with a significant other, or like me, hang out with the cat, just enjoy what there is to enjoy, and it’ll be great.
Happy Chocolate, I mean, Valentine’s Day!
Good evening, Dear Readers:
My sincerest apologies for taking so long. One thing leads to another, then it’s the holidays, and the blog just gets postponed. I’ll try to keep up on this during the new year.
BRRRRRR!!!!! Seems like the whole world is frozen, at least north of the equator! Australia, however, is having record heat, so they’re sort of learning what Texas is like in the summer. Nevertheless, if you are in need of something warm and tasty, please have some Yeast Free Hot Chocolate and remember to bring your pets and critters INSIDE, or somehow keep them from freezing. Not safe for man or beast anywhere!
If you’re wondering how Christmas went, well, it went much better. Hang on, I have a few other things to tell you about first.
Remember the new cupcake shop down in the tunnel, New Addictions? Bad news—they’ve closed for good. I get to my office via an entry that passes right by that place, and I figured, like a lot of places, they would be closed during the week of Thanksgiving. While several eateries in the tunnel were open, most were closed and I just thought they were going to do the same thing.
And when we returned after the Black Friday weekend, the gate was down, and all the fixtures were gone. All that’s left is the name painted on the wall. What a shame—they nearly always had at least one person in there contemplating a cupcake. A click on their website says that they have closed both locations. I sent them an email expressing my condolences, but I haven’t heard back—and there’s a good chance I won’t.
What happened? Who knows. But I’m sure the Fraziers are up to something else, and it’s likely very tasty, too. I hope they do well in whatever they do next; they’re really nice people.
Also, the HeatCageKitchen garden is doing great–I have harvested three tomatoes before the freeze came, and the little orbs are ripening on the breakfast bar. Garlic is shooting up, and while the Meyer lemon plant just grows green leaves, the sage is coming up, the rosemary is enjoying all this, green onions are growing up straight, the strawberry plant is nice and green (no berries), the aloe vera is fine, and I’ve got flat-leaf parsley shoots popping through the soil. No lettuce yet, but I might try radishes soon. I’ve been inundated with seed catalogs after ONE order from Territorial Seed a month or so ago, where I got the garlic.
If you’re someone who watched the cartoon The Jetsons many years ago, or have seen it in reruns, you were likely treated to visions of a 21st century kitchen. Well, it’s what they thought would be “the kitchen of the future,” with lots of buttons everywhere. We have that, with touchpads on everything from microwaves to iPhones, but I don’t think we’re at the point of taking protein pills instead of having food for dinner. The Wall Street Journal did an article recently on the futuristic kitchen we were promised. And while it’s great that we can invent such things, well, the comments indicate that simple is better.
Do you really need a circuit board and touch panel on your refrigerator or built into your dishwasher? Me either. Turn on and run, OK?
Speaking of fun in the kitchen, another WSJ article told me about something I’ve never heard of, called the Bimby. There is also a video, but you have to sign in to see it. Also, this magic machine is NOT, repeat, NOT currently available in the US, and apparently not anytime soon, either. It is available in Canada under the name Thermomix, and one of the commenters says that their power is the same as ours, 110v.
Spinach and cod? Oh, that’s right up there with eggplant lasagna. You have it, OK?
Well, it’s interesting, but not as much fun as the YouTube videos of cats riding the Roomba. More robots at work in our homes, while the cat just sees it as catering to his natural superiority. But seriously, you can kind of do the same thing with a food processor and a toaster oven, or maybe a Vitamix (which I don’t have.)
Now back to Christmas.
As I mentioned last time, Thanksgiving dinner was a gluten-free disaster, thanks in part to my enthusiasm and my guest’s gift of some pretty potent Sangria. However, because the guest knows I’m a good cook, he agreed to give me another chance at Christmas; he was not disappointed this time. He did bring wine, and I had some, but there was no intoxication before dinner, nor after. I did bake the raspberry pistachio cake he hinted at, and he took the whole thing home in a disposable pan.
About a week before, I got an email from The Barefoot Contessa Blog, and one recipe she mentioned was Green Beans Gremolata, so I decided to include that.
I did turkey again, but of course was unable to obtain a turkey breast on the Sunday before Christmas. There was no way I was going to mess with another whole turkey, let alone a 22 pound beast, so I got turkey thighs, which I prefer anyway. They’re kind of down-market for a holiday dinner, but again, no huge beasts for me this time. I went to Ina’s last book, How Easy Is That? and made Herb Roasted Turkey on page 128, just with turkey thighs. Oh, yeah. . . .
Herb Roasted Turkey Thighs
Also in How Easy Is That? I came across Celery and Parmesan Salad on page 62. Pretty darn good!
Celery Parmesan Salad. Must be tasted to be believed.
I also made some more of the Tuscan Chickpea Mash from Foolproof, (page 42) a second cousin to hummus (but with no sesame paste in it.) I made that as an appetizer, and it’s one I really like, but he said, “Meh.” He did try it and said it was good, but just wasn’t interested.
Tuscan Chickpea Mash with cut celery, a nice appetizer.
Because I was baking him a cake the night before, I also decided to use up the rest of the buttermilk and made him some cornbread. It’s an old Martha Stewart recipe from her big green compendium on page 107, and I’ve never had anyone turn it down. Yes, the cake and the cornbread both were NOT, repeat, NOT, gluten free, and no, I didn’t eat it, just made it. (Oh, and Miss Gluten Free was in the grocery buying white flour right before Christmas.)
He doesn’t care, like a lot of folks, so I made him what he likes, which is everything you see here.
No, it’s not gluten free, except for the pie. I emailed this pic to him the night before so he would know I was serious about doing dinner right this time.
I wanted to also make Nigella Lawson’s addictive white bean mash with lemon and garlic, but I just didn’t have the time, even though it doesn’t take too long. Next time, maybe. That steamed chocolate pudding was untouched, and it’s in the pantry for another day.
Dessert was something I wasn’t going to mess with: pecan pie. I was in Erma’s Nutrition Center the Saturday before and decided to go the bought route. I called him to ask what he’d like: pecan, key lime, or pumpkin, which is what they had that day. He said pecan, so I got one.
The Gluten Free Pecan Pie even a manly man could enjoy!
Gluten Free Nation (formerly known as Gluten Free Houston) makes these cute little 5-inch pies that are great. I’ve had blueberry, apple and a few others. This was my first time with pecan, and the pie did not disappoint. A little whipped cream and we had a perfect gluten free dessert. One day I’m gonna visit their store on a Saturday, and maybe I’ll write a whole blog post, too. I’ve met the owner, Randi Markowitz, who herself has celiac disease and created the company to help out folks everywhere who just want to avoid gluten.
After he chowed down on a slice, I told him it was gluten free. He was surprised, and he really liked the pie; but I guess the clue was that I ate a piece, too. No complaints on anything, and he went home happy with a bag full of glutinous munchies, which he later said he enjoyed.
He also claims there are still stains on his kitchen ceiling from when I was cooking in his kitchen. No true. Nothing I made ever exploded in his kitchen.
Mission accomplished. He spent some time with his kitty cat, we caught up on some stuff, and for a little while, all was right with the world. He promised that next time he’d bring some free-range eggs from his bud’s chicken coop to see what I could do with that. Oh, I’ve got just the thing from Giada de Laurentiis–a frittata!
Next up. . .getting over the holidays.
Happy Dining!
Hello, Dear Readers:
Here’s hoping all of you are recovered from not only Thanksgiving but the god-awful day known as “Black Friday.” I had to work, and at least it was cold.
Yesterday I worked in the garden for the winter growing season, and it looks a lot better. Yes, I still have that huge pineapple plant (top left), and I’m gonna pass it along to SOMEBODY who has room for it
Looks pretty good! Cross your fingers. . . .
I’ve planted three pots of garlic, two of a lettuce mix, and parsley, which was nearly gone and has come back to life with some water and a bigger pot. Let’s hope the mint plant resurrects too, as it normally does. I forgot to take closeups, but there are three little green tomatoes on my scraggly tomato plants (top right.) There is a freeze planned this weekend, so they may not happen unless I bring them in.
Now onto what you’ve been waiting for. Yes, I still have two posts sitting in draft, but I thought you’d enjoy reading about how a food blogger does Thanksgiving for a friend–and messes it up royally.
BTW, the duck dinner was scotched, but that’s another story I don’t want to discuss here.
Last year I decided that I would go straight to one of my favorite Thanksgiving things, Leftover Turkey Chowder, or “The Soup of Enlightenment.” I invited the ex-boyfriend who is now “very good friend” for Turkey Day and promised him a dinner he’d never forget.
Trust me, he hasn’t yet. But it is partially his own fault.
When he told me that he was likely going to have hot dogs from the gas station, I couldn’t see that happening, and I insisted on making him something delish. This dinner guest is the son of Big Joel, who passed away in September, and has been busy taking care of his late father’s affairs and recently cleared out his father’s house. He is well aware that I’m a very good cook (usually) and accepted my invitation.
I had to do something nice for him, you know? Unfortunately, that’s not exactly what happened.
As it has happened before, I ended up buying a full sized turkey of 8 pounds the night before. Darnit. Well, it was one of those HEB Naturals, you know, the kind fed a vegetarian diet and no hormones or antibiotics. It was the smallest one I could find, and even a turkey breast “roast” was more expensive.
I got it all thawed, and on the hook for dealing with it. While looking up the Cranberry Ginger Relish recipe, I saw on Martha Stewart’s website about a trick called “spatchcocking.” I’ve heard the term for many years but never bothered to learn what it was. I clicked and decided that’s what I would do.
I will also tell you that I made six batches of that cranberry ginger relish, two of them with SomerSweet for me and my dinner companion, and handed off four batches for the duck roaster folks. They were given two containers full of Cranberry Ginger Relish, and I have not heard a word from them since. We’ll not discuss that here.
I also baked a loaf of Rosemary Bread (with rosemary from the HeatCageKitchen Garden) from The Joy of Gluten-Free, Sugar-Free Baking. Turned some of that into little squares and made something of a stuffing with it for the Enlightenment dumplings. I like it, but. . .let’s get back on track.
The 8-pound spatchcocked turkey took about 90 minutes to cook, simply by cutting out the backbone and letting it lie flat in the roasting pan over a bed of onions using the method I used last year for The Tuscan Turkey, with some of Suzanne Somers’ now-discontinued Tuscan Sea Salt Rub and a stick of butter. Although the pop-up timer worked well, I stuck and instant-read thermometer into the thigh to make sure. When it went past 200F, I knew we were good. This is what it looked like when it came out of the oven:
Looks a bit strange, being flat, but it cooks a lot faster
Then I got to work on some other things when I heard a knock on the door.
Before he arrived, I tidied up a little too, including mopping floors and making the bathroom look extra nice. Mostly everything was done–I made Yeast Free Brownies for dessert, too. However, when it came to the soup. . .
See, I’ve known this guy for more than 10 years, and one thing he does have is manners. And he brought a nice bottle of Red Guitar Sangria, an import from Spain that was darn good. From the first glass until I finally stopped, with about one fifth of the bottle left. Seriously.
Close friends know I don’t drink much, or often. At least this time, I didn’t have a hangover.
I tossed in four tablespoons of gluten-free flour, the yellowish kind from Bob’s Red Mill. The same stuff I use for Babycakes’ Waffles. Yeah, and I did a Rachel Ray–I “eyeballed” four tablespoons, using my fingers. So by the time it was done, and I was quite. . .juiced, I didn’t realize it tasted, well, not the way I intended. I should have put more half-and-half in it, or less of the flour. Oh, boy. . . .
He didn’t care for it, but I did give him half of the roast turkey, which he later told me was “delectable.” When I had the second bowl of the gluten free stuff, I realized it was a) kinda coagulated and b) tasted not quite right. He did mention that he did not like the soup, but was very polite about it. I gave him four slices of the rosemary bread to make sandwiches with, as well as some of the brownies to take home.
I emailed him later and told him that he was right, that the soup wasn’t good at all. He wrote back and said although I made some great food for him previously, including dinner about a month ago. . .this was the worst food he’d ever had! He didn’t like that rosemary bread, either, calling it “inedible.”
Darnit.
He also offered me a cookbook from the 1950’s; um, probably not, but I do have lots of other good books to cook from. He’s a bit afraid I went overboard with the “bizarre ingredients,” but I guess it was too much gluten free. He also said he told a friend that he should have brought over a loaf of whole wheat bread and a jar of Duke Mayo! They had a laugh at my expense, and I promised not to do that to him again.
Amazingly, he did remember a cake I made for him ten years ago. My Aussie friends had sent me a copy of Donna Hay magazine, a well-known chef Down Under who does simple and delicious food. Her cookbooks are widely available here in the US (with American measurements), and one of these days I’m going to get around to getting them, darnit! The magazine is also available here in the US in bookstores, although out of sync with the calendar in order to keep in sync with the seasons. (It’s currently summer Down Under.) Big and glossy, you’ll see some interesting ideas, like the one he mentioned–a pistachio raspberry cake I made for him one time, and I will have to make him again to make up for the bungled Soup of Enlightenment.
Maybe if I can pull it off, I’ll make it correctly this time, with <gulp> real flour, just for him. Cake too. See, he hasn’t gotten the wind of why gluten-free is a good thing. Not my mission to “convert” him, but I do my best with it.
Remember, a holiday is not a good day for experimenting on your friends! Even the good ones.
Happy Dining!
Good evening, Dear Readers:
Well, I’ve been quite busy, and offer my sincerest apologies for the lack of content here. I can’t believe it’s been a month since Halloween already!! SHEEESH!!
I’ve actually got TWO drafts saved, and haven’t been back to finish them off. I hate that, but I’ll try to get back on it this week.
A big Shout-Out to the wonderful folks at Oil & Vinegar in The Woodlands–more in the next post, but I had a recent trip up there and made sure to stop in for some of my favorites. Found out that Anton & Karia Kharoufeh, the owners of the Woodlands Oil & Vinegar, regularly check out my humble blog and remember me when I go up there. Now to have more content! If you’re in The Woodlands Mall sometime, they’re located just inside the entrance by Barnes & Noble (inside the mall, not outside like Anthropologie.) REALLY, really, wonderful olive oils and delicious vinegars that you won’t find anywhere else, as well as some other great gourmet foods. If you’re truly a foodie, it’s worth the trip. And many thanks to The Kharoufehs for being readers, too.
Incidentally, there are two little tomatoes in the HeatCageKitchen garden, and as I write this, it’s been raining pretty good, and as I write this, it’s 40F outside. Well, at least the rosemary is happy. That’s another long-neglected project that might get some attention this weekend when it warms up a bit.
So, my Turkey Day will not actually involve turkey this year., and the years-long “Buddhist Thanksgiving tradition” has given way to other things, so we’re all going in different directions. That’s OK–I’m going to my friends’ K&M’s place, and K will be roasting. . .duck. DUCK! Admittedly, I’ve only had duck once, maybe twice, but I’m game. (Get it?? I’m GAME!!) Another person will be bringing brisket, and I’ll be making a big batch of the Cranberry Ginger Relish that nets me multiple emails for the recipe just about every time I make it. (I’ve made it for myself with SomerSweet instead of sugar, and it works well and tastes great.) Five ingredients including water; sherry vinegar works best at the end. Seriously, it’s easy, quick, and is always well liked. First you taste the sweet and tart, then, POW! That ginger/sherry heat hits you right in the kisser! I made some for me with SomerSweet a couple of weeks ago and it didn’t last long. I just kept going back to the fridge for a spoonful. . .yum.
Oh, BTW, a safety warning–one of my favorite celebrity chefs, Giada de Laurentiis, sliced her finger on the set of Thanksgiving Live last Saturday. I did not see this, but saw the pictures on Facebook later. Giada joins a list of celebrities who have had holiday hospital visits, including Martha Stewart and David Letterman. WARNING: please pay attention, because four years ago, I did the exact same thing with a mandoline.It’s what I get for talking to Auntie on the phone whilst slicing onions for the turkey brine. With folks walking around visiting and talking, it’s easy to lose track of what you’re doing, and you don’t realize it until you see the blood.
Nobody wants blood on the pecan pie, OK?
Now, if your Thanksgiving is a bit on the traditional side, and you have a post-dinner football game, um, Jason Gay in today’s Wall Street Journal has some sage advice. OK, it’s hilarious–go read it, along with the comments.
And finally, the preparations for a presidential pardon of the national turkey is discussed in today’s paper. No, I’m not kidding, they TRAIN the turkey to behave in front of the President. Having been turned on to Animal Planet’s show My Cat From Hell, featuring a wild-looking guy named Jackson Galaxy, I can believe that they can condition a turkey to be cool in front of the President, TV cameras, Secret Service guys with loaded weapons, and wild children all over the place.
What is this, American Turkey Idol?
I wrote a post at this time last year on My Alternate Thanksgiving, and if you missed it, check it out, there is a recipe for Leftover Turkey Chowder that is wonderful. Also included was some advice in The Tuscan Turkey and Turkey–The Big Chicken if you are in need of some help with it. Suzanne Somers no longer sells salt rubs on her site, but you can find recipes online (just do a search) or head over to Williams Sonoma and/or Sur La Table to get some already made.
Since I was spending Thanksgiving alone last year, that meant going directly to the soup, and skipping the traditional dinner. This was my choice, of course, and if you try this soup, you will understand why. SOOO good, but I’ll skip it this time and maybe make it for Christmas, unless I get invited elsewhere again.
More articles to come, and thanks for being patient.
Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!
Well, dear readers, once again, life gets the better of me, and I don’t quite get around to writing on this blog the way I’d like to. But here I am, and I’m looking for new topics regularly.
I’m back on the dieting thing, and have lost about 7 pounds so far. Ignoring sandwiches and a weird looking chocolate cake at the office this week helped. Well, it was not only chocolate cake, but had white icing and filling, as well as either mocha or milk chocolate filling in the center, too. Weird, and when it was cut open, the first words I thought of were “hot mess.” If you’ve ever seen a woman with way too much eye makeup on, you get the idea of what this cake looked like, despite its designer exterior. I didn’t even bother to take a picture. It was really easy to pass up, even for a chocolate lover like me. I wasn’t hungry enough to eat white bread either, so the whole lot sat right by my desk and I didn’t even look at it except in passing.
Seven pounds down, nine-hundred and twelve to go. Just kidding, it’s not that much. Just feels like it.
I also received part of an order today from Territorial Seed Company in Cottage Grove, Oregon. Two packets of what they call “City Lettuce,” some sage and Italian flat-leave parsley. The garlic bulbs will be shipped in a couple of weeks. Let’s see if I can get this stuff going again. The sage dried up earlier this year, and the parsley I had growing never really took off.
Neighbor K gave me 4 big white buckets that came from a restaurant, and they never returned to her office to retrieve them. One of them smells like garlic, so. . .guess what’s going in it? I’ll keep you posted.
Some time ago I wrote about one of my favorite foods, quinoa. It’s now called a “superfood,” although I’m not sure why. I’ve been buying it for 15 years. Sure it’s nutritious, but I just like it because it’s tasty. I’ve made it for a few people, including my two beloved neighbors K and R, who have been occasional taste-testers of new recipes (or the occasional excess), but mostly I make it for myself. Two of the recipes in Giada de Laurentiis’ book Weeknights With Giada include quinoa, and both are pretty tasty. (R is the elderly neighbor lady who has also been the recipient of extra cupcakes from the office.)
I made a small amount of quinoa on Saturday, and it put me to sleep for an hour. So it does have enough carbohydrate to do that. That’s why I don’t eat it too often, and not as much of it, mostly as a side dish, always with other stuff.
I’ve discovered, though, that not everyone is as enthusiastic about quinoa as I am. Granted, not everyone likes everything. Much as I think chocolate is the food of the gods, one of my grandmothers did not like chocolate, as did a project manager I used to work with at Boeing. In fact, when it was birthday cake time, you knew who brought the cake if it was either half chocolate/half vanilla, all vanilla, or something like Italian Cream Cake (which made me taste test it more than once, because it was that good.)
So, in my favorite newspaper, The Wall Street Journal, comes this article on the backlash from quinoa’s new popularity. See, it’s trendy and popular now, much like gluten free, (plus it IS gluten free) so there are folks have become somewhat anti-quinoa from the influx of new quinoa dishes. To me, this is like being anti-tea or anti-cupcake, so I think that many of these folks haven’t had quinoa prepared correctly. That’s just my guess, as well as someone who wrote a letter to the editor on the subject. (Please, someone tell me what the heck “Quinoa Gelato” is.) But I also know it’s a matter of taste, what one person likes, and the preparation at the same time.
No, gluten-free is not a fad--especially not if you have a problem with wheat.
The article also references a fun Bud Light commercial. A man, standing over his grill, is ready to start some heavy duty tailgating at a football game when he discovers that his lovely wife has packed. . .veggie burgers made from “queen-ah”. Personally, my foodie brain wants to know how the heck you make burgers with it, but I’m sure it’s stuck together with a glue like eggs or something. (Then again, I’m always trying to figure out that kind of thing.) But he puts it on the grill anyway, despite it tasting like a “dirty old tree branch,” because his team won the last time he “accidentally” ate it. (Warning: the comments on YouTube underneath aren’t all polite. Read at your own risk.)
Lesson learned here is simple. Ladies—unless you *know* your man is a devoted vegan/vegetarian and enjoys quinoa, he wants MEAT, and he hates surprises. Don’t do that. Trust me on that one. I once brought home a six-pack of designer beer for a certain ex-boyfriend after he said, “surprise me.” He never said that again, and never trusted me with his beer.
Now, the original article is a good overview, but the comments are hilarious. All 127 of them, at this writing. OK, I get it, people get started on something and overboard with it, with soy being a good example. (I still hate soy.) I see drinks, foods and other stuff with something called acai berries, and I still don’t have any idea what they are. Will they grow in the backyard? Then there’s something called goji berries, and the gallons of juice sold by direct marketing (i.e., a neighbor down the street who’s “got a great new home business that’s gonna make me rich.”) I have tried neither of these items, but I’m told goji juice tastes like something rancid. But people who follow all the “healthy trends” consume it because it’s supposed to be “healthy.” Mold is *so* good for you. . . .
So back to the quinoa article comments. If you really need a funny, click on the link above and start reading, and read the oldest first. You’ll see comments like:
My introduction to quinoa occurred while living in the Andes of southern Peru in the 1960s. My dog loved it; I did not. Ever since, I’ve thought of quinoa as Andean kibble.
YUCK! P’TOOEY!
My wife is into all this superfood lunacy. She fed me a “kale smoothie” last week that tasted like it was scooped from the bottom of a swamp. To hell with kale, and I hope she never finds out about quinoa.
This is my award-winning quinoa recipe: add it to a mash and feed it to a pig. Take the pig to a butcher and have him smoke the whole thing. Mmmm …. good eating.
@Charleen: I’m feeding my cows organic quinoa and getting the best quinoa cheese…well, I was until they went on strike for better work conditions…the union negotiators are meeting with management representatives in Aspen this week. I say, “Let Them Eat Cud.”
I hate cilantro too! Tastes like dish soap.
Quinoa is the “Hula Hoop” of food FADS.
Y’all fightin’ over quinoa? Jeezus.
And so much more quality writing that the Journal is known for.
So if you’re interested in trying it for yourself, here’s my favorite quinoa recipe from Suzanne Somers’ book Slim & Sexy Forever. This recipe is in the prior post on quinoa, but I’ll include it here, and add that I toss in a cube of chicken bullion to the water when it boils. REALLY good, honest.
Sauteed Herb Quinoa
1 cup dry quinoa
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
2 shallots, finely diced
1 clove garlic, minced
2 teaspoons finely chopped fresh flat-leave parsley
Sea salt and freshly ground black pepper
Prepare the quinoa according to package directions (or see directions above.)
While the quinoa is cooking, place a saute pan over medium heat. Add the olive oil and shallots; saute for 2 minutes. Add the garlic and cook for 1 minute longer. Add the cooked quinoa and the parsley and stir to combine. Season with sea salt and pepper and serve immediately.
Just because I like it doesn’t mean anyone and everyone who reads this blog is going to suddenly be completely devoted to quinoa. Sure, there are more recipes for it, now, and that’s a good thing. If you decide to try it, hey—no saying you have to eat it again, right?
However, this blog is about the funny. Quinoa optional.
So if there’s anything funny in food, it’s these comments on the WSJ’s website. Go take a look and see what some other anti-quinoa folks are saying.
WARNING: don’t drink anything while you’re reading them, or you’ll be bringing your keyboard or laptop to your local repair shop to be cleaned.
Enjoy!
