
Hello, again, Dear Readers:
I’m sorry I didn’t post last week, I need to make a couple of phone calls and do a bit of updating on this site, but had other pressing matters to contend with. I’ve got a post in the can that I’m about halfway through, and it’s going to be good (I hope.) Nevertheless, I have a back-pocket recipe for you that would be good for a side dish or vegetarian dinner, as long as you have a toaster oven. (Or it’s cold enough for the big oven.)
Big paws-up to friend of the blog JK, whose mechanical intelligence solved a big problem rather quickly in the HeatCageKitchen sink. I did a lot of cooking the July 4th weekend, and unfortunately, while I was cooking, my stove-side shelf suddenly fell off the wall:

The condiment shelf, which has been by the stove for at least 8 years. Handy little item when you’re cooking and don’t want to stop to head for the pantry. (That’s kosher salt in the sugar shaker on the right.)
I bought it at IKEA, and it was fine for years, until last weekend, when it mysteriously fell. Between the shock of having it hit me, the crashing of the bottles, navigating a hot pot and moving it out of the way, one of the screws that holds it in place fell into the garbage disposal. Of course, I didn’t know it went into the garbage disposal until I turned it on. And then it stopped. The motor was on, but it wouldn’t move. A quick look with a flashlight confirmed it was stuck, and I didn’t have the right tools to remove it. Highly annoyed, I just kept cooking.
I mentioned it to JK this week, and because he’s a mechanic and he knows his stuff (like the GER, he’s a manly man.) He asked if I had a pair of needle-nosed pliers. I do, but they didn’t reach. He told me where to find 11″ long needle-nosed pliers. All this week, the sink has been backing up, and I’ve put my gloved hand into the off disposal to clear the little drain spot. Yesterday, in between cooking projects, I got fed up with it, went to the O’Reilly’s Auto Parts on Bay Area Boulevard and bought a pair of those infamous 11″ long needle-nosed pliers. I confirmed the screw’s location with the flashlight, reached in with the long pliers, and after a couple of misses, I pulled and heard the POP! And that was the end of that. The sink disposal is once again working properly, and I can clear out any little pieces that land down there.
WHEW!
Of course, I texted him and said Thank You.
Neighbor E and I went out to a fundraiser for our local library Friday night. Now, when I say we went out, well, let me explain–this wasn’t a nightclub or fancy country club. Our fabulous new HEB held a tasting event, and if the library could get 100 people to come in and sample food, get stickers for each stop, and turn them in, they would donate $1000 to the Freeman Library. I dragged him out (not literally) and a good time was had by all, plus some delicious food. I didn’t take any pictures, because it was kind of busy. But I went back on Saturday afternoon to get a few things and have lunch. I talked to one of the employees I see regularly; she told me that over 250 people showed up, so yes, the Freeman Library will get that donation. If you feed them, they will come. With delicious food they sample all the time, is it any wonder people showed up in droves?
On Saturday, I was wearing a summer dress that I finally finished. It’s a McCall’s pattern (click here if you want to see it, version D, made in a similar colored cotton.) When I was checking out, there was a lady from the pharmacy area who, I guess, was there to tell people about HEB’s in-store pharmacy. She said it was her first day at that location, and she just loved it. Well, we all do! Then, she complimented me on the dress, and also my flat Crocs, which were very comfortable. I put the straw hat back on because I was getting ready to leave, (keeps the sun out of my eyes) and she said that I was definitely “on-trend.” Nobody ever told me that before! So my day was made. I told her that I’d just finished it–surprise!–and that it was a McCall’s pattern. She couldn’t believe I MADE it. She said, “I don’t even know what that means.” I said, “well, I wouldn’t expect you to–you’re a pharmacist!” Not as many people sew these days, but I do hope it becomes a thing like grown-up coloring books.
Now, about this recipe.
Neighbor E gave me a butternut squash, mostly because he didn’t know what to do with it. (He’s also given me more potatoes!) I gave it some thought, and I knew just the thing: Quinoa Pie with Butternut Squash.
So, if you clicked on the recipe link, you’re probably wondering why the heck I would make a Thanksgiving dish during the summer. No, I’m not yet getting ready for Thanksgiving, but I did tease my former Buddhist district leaders about it. When we used to have our own local dinner, now and then during the year, I would tell them, “It’s never to early to start planning Thanksgiving!” Of course, in July, that got me some funny looks–but, see, these folks were originally from Taiwan. I forget that sometimes, not everyone gets our absurd American humor.
Since I was given the squash, I just wanted to treat it right. But as you read this post, remember that not everything in the HeatCageKitchen is perfectly symmetrical. This isn’t The Food Network! But in between cooking for the week and using it up, I think I did pretty good.
First thing I did was make my weekly breakfast quiche in the slow cooker, and then turkey thighs and a small pork roast. I had the brilliant realization that although I was preparing them differently, they could both go into the toaster oven at the same time. The thighs had some sage compound butter on them, and the pork roast had olive oil and a salt rub.

The setup.
They both went in at 400F for an hour and 15 minutes, and came out delicious:

Lunch!
And, of course, the chef”s privilege, the roast turkey skin:

There is, honestly, nothing better.
Pull it off with two forks, and let it drain and cool for a bit on paper towels. Then, enjoy the crispiest, tastiest thing you will ever experience. This works for roast chicken too, and is best with olive oil and salt/pepper or other dry spices. I introduced AC to this a while back and she was instantly a fan. Caveat: you will have to do this when the turkey or chicken comes right out of the oven. Don’t let it sit too long, or put it in the fridge; the crispness will be forever lost.
Once I got the meats cut and packaged for the fridge, I got started this tasty superfood treat.
Quinoa Pie with Butternut Squash is a good thing to have in case one of your holiday dinner guests brings a friend and says suddenly, “Oh, he/she’s vegetarian.” Oh, bleep, now what do you do? Well, if you have this already made, with a few other nice little side dishes, it won’t be a problem. But if the non-veg folks get wind of it, it might not last, so make plenty if you’re having a crowd. (It helps to ask in advance, but even then, you never know.)

The setup.
Those paltry looking sage leaves are the last from the garden. I don’t know if it’s because I planted it with the oregano, or what–but the darn thing is almost gone. That is what I could salvage from what’s left; I was going to give Neighbor E a big bunch. It was thriving and over-producing not long ago. Maybe it was too much water, or the heat, but it looks like I’ll be either buying another plant or starting seeds soon. I like sage for poultry, though, despite the stinky-feet smell of the live plant.
Also, this recipe is supposed to be vegetarian, but I was just in a hurry and used chicken bullion cubes instead of vegetable stock. I’ll show you a cheat with it shortly. Note that there is real cheese in it. If you wanted to make it vegan, you’d have to use some of that god-awful fake-me-out vegan stuff, which is probably made with soy. YUCK. You ruin it, you eat it!
So let’s make it.
First, the sage–I rinsed it, pulled the stems off 18 of them, dried them and set them aside:

Normal sage leaves do not look this skimpy.
Then the rest were rinsed and dried for the finely chopped stuff:

Still not sure what happened.
Oh, and here’s an Amy tip for you: rubber anti-slip rug backing, cut into small pieces, keeps your cutting board from sliding all over the kitchen while you chop:

I don’t know why I never shared this one before. MUCH safer than having your cutting board slip around!
Chop off the ends, and it will sit upright on the cutting board while you peel it.
I actually have the vertical vegetable peeler, but for odd things like this, I prefer the horizontal bladed model:
And this is why I say nothing is symmetrical in the HeatCagekitchen. I was supposed to cut rings for the bottom of the plate, but instead, cut it sort of wrong. However, the inside is similar to spaghetti squash, and you just scrape out all the seeds and stringy parts:
And then I manufactured the rings:

Oh, don’t ask. . . .
Then you chop up the rest of it in little quarter-inch dice:

Tah-dah! Got there in the end.
Top with a half-dozen sage leaves and a bit of oil, and roast. I roasted them in the toaster oven, and honestly, it all came out just fine:
Once it’s finished, just set it aside to cool. Switching gears, it’s time to get the rest of this recipe going–the quinoa part.
Now, I used chicken stock, because I don’t care if it’s vegetarian; I’m just messing around with it anyway. I don’t have any veg bullion cubes (and I don’t know if they exist) but I’ll show you a trick I learned from Nigella Lawson: just make the broth from the bullion. This recipe calls for 2 cups, so I crumbled two cubes into a measuring cup:
Added some very hot water:
Stirred it and let it melt the bullion:
And you’re there.
So, chopped onion:
Deploy the garlic doo-dad and chop it:
And finely chop the rest of the fresh sage:
First into the pot is some oil, on medium heat, to cook the chopped onion and garlic.
Rinse your quinoa well:

Always rinse to get rid of the powdery residue.
Then add the broth or stock to the pot, and the quinoa:
If you’re not familiar with quinoa, this is the important part: keep an eye on it. It’ll take about 15 minutes to cook and absorb all the water. If you’re not careful, it will burn on the bottom of the pot. I know, I’ve done it. What you’re looking for is for it to be just a tiny bit liquid, but all of the water absorbed:

Like that. Not soupy, not dry.
Take it off the heat (the recipe suggests putting it into a bowl, but why dirty another dish here?) Add in the chopped sage, the 3 tablespoons of Parm cheese, and the roasted diced squash into the quinoa, along with salt and pepper, and mix well.
Now it just comes together. If you’ve ever made a Pineapple Upside-Down cake, this will make sense to you. Place the butternut squash rings at the bottom of a greased 9-inch pie plate, and put the prettier sage leaves inside them:

There were actually supposed to be only five rings, but I made it six! I went to Tulane at night; I can’t count.
Now carefully add the quinoa mixture on top of the pie:
And pack it down as firmly as you can. Remember, the only binder is a small amount of Parm cheese:

I should have used a different utensil to pack this down, like stainless steel, and wide.
This isn’t the first time I’ve made this dish, but the last couple of times, it sort of fell apart on me. Even though I packed it down, it still came apart, although not like the last time. More pressure next time around.
Now it’s time to bake it–20 minutes at 375. If you’re like me, you turned off that darn oven for a while. The countertop oven re-heats quickly, so it wasn’t a problem. Let it cool for a bit, What comes out looks like this when you invert it:

Ain’t that nice?
Unfortunately, the pie did not fall out of the plate like it should have. Since it’s not Thanksgiving, I don’t care. I just sliced it like any other pie and had me a slice. I also brought some to the HeatCageKitchen taste-testers, Neighbor E and Neighbor R.

See? I didn’t pack it down enough, and it crumbles apart a little.
So, what did it taste like? Because I used the chicken bullion and there was Parm cheese, it was a bit saltier than I expected–my bad. Next time, veg broth or something else not as salty.
Neighbor E feels like it could be a stuffing/dressing, served as a side dish with turkey with Thanksgiving dinner. Never thought of that, but he’s right–it would go well with turkey as well as without. Maybe serving it in muffin form to make it easier, eliminating the squash rings for decor, and pressing sage leaves on top? It’s an idea.
Neighbor R also enjoyed it, and when I told her what E said, she smiled and said, “it does kind of taste like stuffing!” Plus, she hasn’t had squash in a while so it was a nice treat for her. (JK said he doesn’t like squash at all, but I could get him to try one bite of it, if he were here.)
However you make it, or whenever, Quinoa Pie with Butternut Squash is a tasty dish for carnivores and vegetarians alike. Agreed, it’s a little more work than the things I usually make, but one taste will tell you it’s totally worth it. For a Sunday dinner, you could make it the night before and just re-heat it to serve it warm, or serve it at room temperature. And it’s a back-pocket recipe for the occasion where you need a tasty, filling vegetarian dish that won’t leave the veggies feel unloved. (I’ve uploaded the printable PDF to the Recipes Page if you’re thinking about dinner for next weekend.)
Enjoy!
Hello, again, Dear Readers:
No, I haven’t been swimming in the deluge of water that’s come to Texas. It finally stopped raining for a couple of days, and I’ve gotten back on the bike. I missed it. We’ve had some off-on showers, like the one that passed over us yesterday afternoon. It was the length of an average song by The Monkees.
Haven’t drowned in a vat of melted chocolate, either–I wish. In fact, I haven’t had chocolate in a while–but that’s a good thing. The most dangerous thing I’ve done recently is go visit Neighbor E and mess with his newly adopted cat. Big, fluffy and sweet, even to the dog, but she does like to bare her claws, too.
I found this funny online somewhere a while back and have forgotten to include it. I’ve made some kitchen mistakes, as everyone has, but despite what might the GER might tell you, I’ve never been this bad.

We’ve all been there.
Thought you might enjoy that one.
The HeatCageKitchen garden is very green and very happy these days. Looks like I might get a few more Key limes after all. In addition to the one little bud growing:
There is a sudden bunch of little flowers at the top of the tree that should yield a few more of them.

That’s not a corsage!
The 3 Meyer lemons are getting bigger:

One of three.
And there are a few tomatoes around:

Whenever it ripens, it will be red.
Plus more behind them:

And these are little yellow SunGolds.
The basil has grown up pretty well, and it’s time to make some pesto from the big plant. Don’t worry, there’s more basil coming (I just need to plant these little rootlings):

See? It works!
I’ll plant them in this pot, and eventually I hope they become two feet tall:

See the previous rootlings that are growing?
Although it’s officially summer, we’ve been warmed up for a while. Now that it’s June, well, you won’t be wanting to turn on that stove anymore, will you? Have you dusted off your Crock Pot and started cooking in it yet? Why not? Check some of my older posts for some recipes, or hit Pinterest and search there. You’ll never run out of recipes for your Crock Pot or waffle maker there–trust me on that. (No grapes into the Crock Pot=wine yet.) Seriously, though, there’s no reason to heat up the kitchen if you don’t want to. And I found another “forget it” thing to tell you about that can keep you cool this summer, and make mornings a little easier, whether you’re single or married with children.
But first. . . .
Sue Moran of The View From Great Island just posted something she calls “Vegan Breakfast Bowls.” Now, they do look tasty, but they’re not the tofu-and-bean combination that might spring to mind. Sue’s breakfast bowls are more like granola types of mixtures with fruit, nuts almond milk, chia seeds and the like. (The post is sponsored by the producer of the non-dairy milk she uses. I’ve never seen 1915 BoltHouse Farms products, and they are available here–but I’m not touching soy milk.)Â I’m a bit skittish about using chia seeds after my experience a couple of years ago, but occasional chia dishes might be OK. I haven’t tried them since, but I would always urge caution and suggest backing off if you find yourself with gut pains.
So, another item I’ve seen on Pinterest and places like Facebook is something called “Overnight Oats.” Bloggers have been doing them for some time, I just never paid attention because. . .I generally don’t eat oatmeal. I got some coupons on Friday, and in the flier, I see that Quaker Oats is getting in on the act. It’s really simple, you just soak them overnight in milk with some other ingredients to make a full meal. Quaker’s page has a primer on how to put them together, including a YouTube video. Got any Mason jars around? There you go–toss it together the night before and stash in the fridge. (But it’s not mandatory–any big enough bowl or container will do.) Your breakfast is waiting for you in the fridge. How easy is that?
But it can get boring. . .so I head over to Pinterest and find some new stuff. Oh, boy, did I find some, too–not all of them Paleo/Sugar-Free versions, but who cares?
I’d forgotten until just now that Ree Drummond, The Pioneer Woman, has made two recipes on her Food Network show for Overnight Oatmeal–one for her daughter’s Dorm Room Dining episode, and another when she found herself alone on the ranch.
Two of the more photogenic and interesting recipes I found on Pinterest are the Lemon Cream Pie Overnight Oats from Destination Delish, and the very decadent Hazelnut Brownie Batter Overnight Oats from Life A Little Brighter.

Lemon Cream Pie Overnight Oats | Destination Delish – Oats, chia seeds, lemon zest, and maple syrup are soaked in almond milk for a healthy breakfast inspired by a lovely lemon dessert (Source: Destination Delish)

Hazelnut Brownie Batter Overnight Oats from LifeALittleBrighter.com. OMG–Chocolate!!!! (Source: LifeALittleBrighter.com)
Granted, using coffee creamer in your breakfast oatmeal might be a bit unusual, but. . .if it’s what floats your boat, so what? I think that would be a “special occasion” kind of recipe for me. I don’t buy that kind of thing, never did. Just give me milk or half-and-half for my coffee, please.
After seeing the Quaker website for it, I decided to try Overnight Oatmeal for myself. I had to head to Target last night, and picked up this container of oatmeal for $2.04:

Plain, old-fashioned oatmeal.
As a rule, overnight oatmeal is not made with the instant/microwave kind, which is already packaged with sugar, flavorings, dried fruit, etc. (You can try it, but results are not guaranteed.) This is what you’re looking for, just. . .oats:

See it? 100% oats.
The suggested container is a Mason/Ball jar, and the point of the Quaker ad was to offer a “free” jar for you to make said Overnight Oats in. However, I’m sure any bowl or kitchen container would work well. I just happened to use one of the Ball jars that I bought for the lettuce experiment.

The setup.
Quaker’s website says to use a one-to-one ratio of oats and milk (or water.) That goes in first, a half cup each:

Oats

Milk
Then it’s just a choice of ingredients, really. In my case, I wanted to try it with whatever I had on hand, which included the dreaded chia seeds:

Just a tablespoon, although next time, I might try less.
And a tablespoon of peanut butter. Crunchy, of course, or what’s the point?

I just prefer crunchy, that’s all.
I should point out if you are planning to add nuts as a garnish or crunch, like slivered almonds or chopped walnuts, don’t add them until you are ready to eat. That way they don’t get. . .soaked. But since crunchy peanut butter is my preference, well, it was crunchy enough for me. Then I tossed in a tablespoon of cocoa powder:

Chocolate!
Two tablespoons of agave syrup:
And some vanilla extract:

Mexican vanilla, not the homemade stuff this time.
Although I grabbed the homemade extract at first, and left it in the setup picture, I later realized that adding a tablespoon of vodka in an uncooked breakfast dish was probably not a good idea. So I added a tablespoon of the grocery store stuff. (Were I cooking the oatmeal, the vodka-based vanilla would have been fine.)
At this point, you can also add fruit if you like: berries, bananas, cherries, whatever you like. If you add frozen fruit, don’t thaw it out–the liquids given off by the thawing fruit will flavor the oatmeal. Recipes abound, so take your pick. Banana? Go for it. Blueberry? Drop them in. Yogurt? Go for it. I’m sure it would be difficult to do this “wrong.”
I could have also added some cinnamon, or other sweet-enhancing spice, I just didn’t think about it last night. But it all went into the jar, and I gave it a stir:

OK, this was prior to the stir.
Put the lid on it, and stashed it in the fridge before bed. (Even though I had some breakfast quiche there that I made Sunday.)
Most of the reading I’ve done says to leave the oats for at least 8 hours so they soften up enough. It’s a bit like ceviche, really–there’s no heat involved, but soaked in liquid overnight, it’s “cooked.”
So what happened? I was looking forward to this. After I stirred it last night, I licked the fork. . .it was pretty tasty, but I waited. So when I fumbled into the kitchen, (after some coffee) I took it out of the fridge:

Good morning!

A closer look.
At this point, it doesn’t move without help. The chia seeds also absorb a whole lot of the liquid, so it’s like you added powdered gelatin. If you want your oats a bit thinner, you could add a little more milk or water at this point.

Because it really won’t move.
I used that big silicone spoon-type spatula to get it all out of the Ball jar and into a bowl. Scraped every drop of it out. I’m not fishing it out with an iced tea spoon. I want some food!

Amy’s Chocolate Peanut Butter Overnight Oats
It was pretty good, and filling, too. If I were still working downtown, I’d take some of this with me to eat mid-morning.
Now, if you’re the kind who likes to make breakfast ahead of time like I do, Overnight Oats will hang out in the fridge for a couple of days (that’s what I read), but I don’t think it will be that good at the end of a week. So, you’d make enough for Monday through Wednesday, and on Wednesday evening, make some for Thursday through Saturday. (And on Sunday, it’s waffle time! Or out for brunch.)
And where has this been all our lives? Hiding out in someone’s grandma’s idea factory, I guess. But now that it’s out on social media, the idea is available for all of us to enjoy, just like the great waffling ideas.
See, we as Americans, or maybe some of us, have this thing where we want to make things better. Sometimes, it’s a blogger like me messing around with a new way to do something, or like Elena Amsterdam, making easy, tasty grain-free foods. Sometimes it’s a kid who looks to solve a problem and ends up inventing something new and highly useful. And sometimes it’s an engineer, project manager or IT person who just knows there’s a better way to do things and changes the direction of an entire company or industry. But we all think about it–there’s got to be a better way. As Americans, we look to do that. I know it’s not always Americans, though–our “better way” ideology has spread, thanks to things like social media, and now one good idea can be spread across the world to those in need of it.
Now we know that we can make oatmeal without the stove or microwave, and a hot breakfast on a 95F day can be turned into something delicious and cool. And it’s easy! (I plan to tell Neighbor R about this, in case she wants to try it.)
So, like slow cooking and waffling, Overnight Oatmeal is one more new trend to make life–and your breakfast–easy, and keep your kitchen from heating up in the long, hot summer. (Especially in Texas.)Â Do a search, or get on Pinterest and find something you like for breakfast tomorrow, so you can set it up this evening. With Pinterest recipes, you could literally eat a different variety of oatmeal every day and never have the same thing twice.
This is a screen shot of just typing in “overnight oatmeal” into Pinterest:

See? (My first screenshot on the blog!)
Now, you see the pictures (or “pins”) that come up, but look above that. Just under where I typed in “overnight oatmeal,” you see all those little rectangles with different descriptions in them. “In A Jar,” “Healthy,” “Crockpot,” “Frozen Fruit”–all those are buttons that refine your search by those topics. (That’s a thing when you search for something on Pinterest–very useful.) Touch the arrow to the right, and you’ll see more refinements. Keep going until you hit the end, if there is one. Just takes a little getting used to, and you can find just about anything on Pinterest. Type in something else you’re interested in if you don’t believe me.
And here’s something else to think about: if you make it while you’re either making dinner or doing the washing up, you’re done for the night.
So–what will you try first?
Do you have a suspicious spouse/partner who will look at you funny when you put that jar in the fridge, or will you have to hide your new breakfast? (Not me!) If you do, don’t be surprised if you try or create something tasty and it turns out *they* like it too (as Krista from Destination Delish found out.) Make enough for two (or more, if necessary.) If they don’t like it, well, like my father used to tell us. . .”more for me.”
Enjoy!
Happy Monday, Dear Readers!
Sorry I’ve been away, it’s been a bit crazy. Last Wednesday, I busied myself with laundry, cooking, and switching my electric company to one that is nicer, less expensive, and with a US-based call center. With the lovely weather we had after the drowning rains, I’ve also been out on the bike again, every night except Tuesday, when I hit HEB for a stock-up run.
I planned on going for a ride when I got home. That didn’t happen. When I realized how much I’d been walking around that place, I realized I already had some exercise–and that wore me out! Thank heavens for the two folks handing out samples of fish, chicken, and a tasty cucumber salad I hope to make again one day.
Speaking of HEB, apparently it’s been discovered. Snappy Gourmet shared this Business Insider article on Facebook the other day about why HEB is the #1 grocery store in America. What the heck? All they had to do was ask me. I mean, they have stuff like this:

No, I didn’t buy them. This time.
And this was under the indoor pink tent next to the bakery section for Mother’s Day:
![IMG_3096[1]](https://i0.wp.com/heatcagekitchen.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/05/IMG_30961-e1462574465541-768x1024.jpg?resize=640%2C853)
Those are chocolate covered strawberries in the perimeter around the cake.
Does your grocery store do Date Night? Mine does:

And why not take your date to dinner at HEB?
Not all HEBs have a coffee shop in the store. Ours doesn’t, but the store in The Woodlands does, and it’s smaller than our new store. Ditto for Cafe on the Run–we don’t have one, but the League City store does as well as The Woodlands.
If all these newly relocated people fall in love with HEB, we’ll never get rid of them. Texas will be doomed.
Speaking of food shopping, Neighbor E told me last week that all The Fresh Market stores in Texas are being closed, along with two other states. They’ve only been here in our ‘hood for two years. There are now hired security guards at the front entrance, and they’ve reduced the operating hours to 9am to 6pm, until they close on May 18th. That’s how tightly competitive the grocery market is here in Texas–and Whole Foods isn’t doing too good, either. The Fresh Market is selling everything at 50% off, all sales final, so if you’re in the area of one of these departing stores, it’s time to stock up.
Between Hancock Fabrics, Sports Authority and now The Fresh Market, that’s a lot of folks in retail losing their jobs in Clear Lake real soon.
Hmmm. . .maybe Trader Joe’s will finally open up in our little nook of Houston? THAT would make life very tolerable! (For a while.)
Well, anyway. . .I wanted to make some food in the Crock Pots, so I bought some chicken, some pork chops, and other ingredients to make something called Citrus Spice Chicken. See, it’s getting on that time of the year, and if you haven’t been using your slow cooking Crock Pots, it’s time to get them out and start using them again (and your waffle maker, too.) Daily, if need be–you don’t need to be heating up your kitchen all day long until October or November when we get a puff of cool air. (We barely had a “winter,” and now it’s spring.)
We went right from winter to nearly summer, but once I decided to put my winter boots back in the closet, we had a front come through bringing cooler, drier air. It’s not really cool enough for boots now, but last Monday morning, I could have gotten away with them.
So, last year about this time, I wrote a longer piece on the slow cooker, a kitchen standby that, with a little forethought and planning, can make your regular cooking easier while keeping the kitchen from heating up during the summer, or allow you to cook more at the same time, anytime of year. Just in the last week or two, Ree Drummond made this Slow Cooker Mexican Chicken Soup on her show. I’ve seen Ree use it a couple of times before, and in my last post, I told you about Giada de Laurentiis getting into slow cooking as well.
I didn’t mention this in my post last year, but I should have. Giving credit where it’s due, the GER is the reason I got into slow cooking, and I even taught the last boyfriend (“Voldemort”) how to use his. The GER would use it occasionally, but I bought a cookbook so I could use it more often. I’d never had one, and when I was getting ready to move, I bought two. Last year, of course, I also bought replacement parts for them. . .but I told you about that, too.
I hate to use the trade name Crock Pot, even thought that’s what I have. Turns out a number of other companies make different varieties slow cookers. My mechanic friend has a Hamilton Beach and I’m trying to coax him to use it more often. But Crock Pot is the original, and it’s a registered company name. So I’ll use them interchangeably. If you have one by Cuisinart. . .well, you know what I’m talking about.
One thing I didn’t mention was the use of the plastic liners available for slow cookers. I hate to buy more new stuff, but I have to say, these liners are awesome. They’re not available in every store, but you might be able to ask your grocer to carry them. They come in a box of four, and I try to buy two boxes at a time. After scrubbing the heck out of my stoneware crocks for years, I don’t ever want to be without them again. With the breakfast quiche I make on Sunday, once it cools, I just lift it right out of the cooker, turn it upside down on a cutting board, pull the liner off and toss it. Cut the quiche, package it up for the week, and I’m good. Just a quick rinse of the stoneware and it’s all done. It really is that good, and worth the money to buy them and extra minute to set them into the stoneware crock. You can read more about Reynold’s wonderful invention here.
How come I never think of inventing stuff like this?
Dana Carpender isn’t a well-known cookbook author like some of the other folks I have on my shelf. I have two of her low-carb books, and this recipe comes from her 200 Low Carb Slow Cooker Recipes book. It’s one of those “dump-and-go” recipes where you literally put the food in and all that. Pretty tasty, but one of the ingredients is another recipe in the book for ketchup. No kidding, but it’s worth it.

I know, it’s weird–but normal doesn’t make the world go round!
First, you make Dana’s No-Sugar Ketchup, which is just a few ingredients in the blender and blitzed. I made it the night before and refrigerated it. Came out like gelatin–but really, it’s an ingredient and good. This recipe appears in all of her cookbooks. Store-bought ketchup is usually loaded with sugar, so this is a good alternative if you can’t find something sugarless or something like low carb.
Into a blender, add:
- 6 ounces (one small can) tomato paste
- 2/3 cup apple cider vinegar
- 1/3 cup water
- 1/3 cup Splenda (I used SomerSweet, but you could also use your favorite)
- 2 tablespoons minced onion (I used a shallot, and it was just enough)
- 2 cloves garlic
- 1 teaspoon salt
- 1/8 teaspoon ground allspice
- 1/8 teaspoon ground cloves
- 1/8 teaspoon pepper
Run the blender until the onion disappears. Scrape all of it into a container, then store in the fridge (or freezer for longer storage.

Ketchup!
At 7½ calories a tablespoon, you can enjoy the heck out of this on fries or anything you like. But that’s not what it’s for today, is it?

Really, it’s good. Here we start mixing.
Now let’s make this chicken.

The setup
To the mixing cup, add 1/3 cup lemon juice, the sweetener, a half-teaspoon of orange extract, a half-cup of the ketchup, 2 tablespoons of low-sugar orange marmalade, a half-teaspoon each of ground cinnamon and allspice, an eighth teaspoon of ground cloves, and (if you’re brave) a quarter teaspoon of cayenne. I backed off and added an eighth teaspoon of cayenne and it was good, but I call that “optional,” and I think you could leave it out altogether if you wanted. Mix that all up:

The cooking marinade
Once that’s mixed (you could do this the night before and just put the bowl in the fridge until you’re ready to make it in the morning), add 3 pounds of boneless, skinless chicken thighs to your slow cooker:

My favorite part of the chicken, or the turkey.
Pour the mixture over the top:
Stir a little to coat the chicken well:

Yum.
Cover, cook for six hours, and, tah-dah!

Dinner!
A little sweet, a tiny bit spicy with a really, really good flavor to it.
The book says to serve it with something else called “Cauli-Rice,” a recipe on page 239, but I haven’t tried that one yet. “Cauli-Rice” is simply chopping up a half head of cauliflower by running it through the food processor with the shredding blade and chopping it up small. My local HEB also sells chopped cauliflower ready to saute, which is what would probably be a good way to cook your “Cauli-Rice.” Microwaving it with a little water or steaming are suggested, but I like saute in butter or olive oil until it’s done. But really, any good, healthy side dish would be great alongside this chicken, or (I know I shouldn’t say this) on top of some gluten-free pasta, which is generally. . .not always low-carb.
In fact, it would be perfect for spiralized veggies, if you do that sort of thing.
Do you have one of them spiralizer thingies? Or have you bought the spiralizing attachment for your KitchenAid Stand Mixer? Um, no. . .and the reason I haven’t delved into it is because I don’t have a spiralizer thingy. Or at least, so I thought. I was out prowling around in the mall the other day, and realize that I actually already have something for spiralizing veggies, and didn’t know it.
How did this happen? Well. . . .
I was asked to make an apple pie or something for a party many years ago, and I was telling one of the guys in IT Engineering about it. He offered me the use of his apple peeling/coring contraption, and I happily accepted. It worked great! I got them all peeled. . .and then I broke it. I don’t know how, but I broke the darn thing. He was on vacation for two weeks, so I had time to scare up a new one. At the same time, I ordered the red one for myself, and I have used it a few times since then, but not in a while. I was in the mall while the brakes were being worked on, and I saw it in either Macy’s, Sears, or somewhere else that kitchen stuff was being sold when the epiphany happened.
I also saw a 3-quart Crock Pot for $12.97 in Sears, in red, but no, I didn’t purchase it. And speaking of red, a very nice lady in Macy’s Fine Jewelry Department allowed me to try on my ultimate dream ring:

Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome The Duchess of El Dorado.
That ring’s MSRP was much as the car I bought in 1998 when I moved to Houston. (I’ve always believed that the royal engagement ring would look better with a red stone, and I was right.)
There is a smaller, but no less fabulous, version at Macy’s, for considerably less:

This ring would make me “The Countess of Clear Lake.” Still my dream ring, but not as big and bold.
Did I forget to mention that they were 45% off that day? No, I didn’t buy any rings. Just a double-chocolate brownie at Starbucks. I needed that more.
Oh, yeah, I was talking about food, wasn’t I?
So, one day, when I think about it, I will start spiralizing veggies for myself, and see how I like it. Heck, I might actually spiralize something and put it on the waffle iron like hash browns–let’s see what I come up with. For now, though, my attention is elsewhere, including keeping up with this humble foodie blog, and keeping my faithful readers healthy, happy and fed.
But really, a good hot meal is within your reach with a slow cooker. You don’t need anything with electronic controls, connected to your WiFi, or anything else confusing (unless you like it that way.) Get one that turns on and turns off, and you’ll have a great dinner without heating up the kitchen. (And you can serve it with spiralized veg if you want.)
I’ve got some research to do on my next post, but I hope to have a full report on. . .well, I’ll tell you about it when the time comes. Next week is our monthly garden lecture, and the topic this month is Plants of the Bible. You’re probably thinking to yourself, “why would you go to a lecture on plants from the Bible?” Well, because it’s plants, and because it’s interesting. (I’ll be mentioning key topics if I remember to write them down.)
For now, go get your slow cooker out so you can make dinner tomorrow the easy way.
Happy (Slow) Cooking!
Hello, Dear Readers:
I’m back with another post, with information about new trends, delicious food and healthy things.
First up: a cat being a cat.
Longtime readers of this blog know I love all the kitties, from the tiniest neo-natal just-born kitties the size of a kiwi fruit to the mighty Siberian Tiger. I believe that a cat is a cat is a cat, no matter what the size, species or coloring. They’re all just cats on the hunt. I had cats for 21 years (the last one being Jezebel the Step-Kitty, co-parented with the GER), and they really are the same as a tiger, lion, bobcat or jaguar, just smaller (and they usually use a litterbox inside.) Most house cats can’t tear off a limb the way a tiger can, making the mighty tiger unsuitable for keeping as a pet. If you talk to the GER, he’ll have you believe that Catmandu could indeed take your arm off, or at least a finger. Catmandu has been dead for 4 years, and the GER is still afraid of him.
So I enjoyed the story of smart a Norwegian Forest cat named Clive who didn’t have to hunt much while he lived for two years in a pet food warehouse in Britain. He “went missing,” but he didn’t go far. He did what any cat would do–he found a verified food source and stayed. Why go home when they only feed you once or twice a day, when you can just camp in this place and eat whenever you want? Workers knew there was something stealing food, so they borrowed a cat trap from a local rescue group and caught his furry butt. (The microchip told them how to find the owners.) Clive got pretty porky while he was there, but once he gets re-settled into the household and used to being around his housemates again, he’ll probably lose most of that extra weight. But he’ll probably be a bit grouchy having to wait for his food again.
Because. . .that’s a cat for you.
Speaking of creatures, I was watering the garden the other night, and I looked down and saw. . .two little beady black eyes looking back at me. AAAAHHHHH!!!! I jumped back, and I hope I didn’t yell too loud. I looked that little adolescent possum right in the eyes and told him to “shoo.” He turned around and lumbered away. . .but I don’t know where he went. They might be living under the Boston Fern I wish I’d never acquired. So now I have evidence that the possums think it’s their personal salad bar. There’s no way to keep them out, really, because they’re like cats–they climb fences, get through little holes and everything else. So it’s probably not the first time I’ll have a close encounter of the furry kind back there, especially if the tomatoes, peppers and strawberries do well.
OK, it’s a little late for the holidays, but I came across this post on putting a turkey on an outdoor grill. Sometimes in the south, it may be too hot to roast the darn thing indoors (unless you have one of those turkey roaster ovens you can park outside or on a patio that’s separate.) Sometimes Thanksgiving is 80 degrees around here, too, so it wouldn’t be a bad thing to keep in mind for November. Remember, it was 80 degrees on Christmas Day in Houston; the cold front missed the flight.
But if you’re getting ready for graduations, bridal or baby showers or other upcoming festive occasions, this article on Exposed Cakes from the Trader Joe’s monthly flier will give you some ideas. I’m not wild about less frosting, since that, to me, is one of the best parts of nearly any cake, but, well, you judge for yourself:

In The Garden Of Strawberry Cake, from the Trader Joe’s website article.
I guess it’s because you don’t have to cut the cake open to see what’s underneath. But it’s a nice picture. Would you make it?
If you want something to go with your frosting-challenged cake, there’s some new flavors from the Central Market brand that just showed up at our fabulous HEB:

Oh, YEAH! Who needs Haagen-Dazs?
See any favorites you want to try? Here’s mine:

This can only be good. . .but not sure why it was manhandled.
And of course, chocolate.

Is there any other kind?
No, I haven’t tried any of them yet. I have ice cream like other people have alcohol–to celebrate a special occasion, to deal with something stressful, or any time I need a sweet. When I broke up with a boyfriend–I had ice cream. When it was my birthday, I had ice cream. Usually, it’s Blue Bell, but next time, it will probably be this one. But this container is twice the cost of the Blue Bell or HEB Creamy Creations I usually get. So. . .no rush on trying them.
Switching gears. . . .
Do you have any old cookbooks? I mean, REALLY old cookbooks? How about those ubiquitous (and expensive) recipe cards collections? I actually have my mother’s–the Betty Crocker Recipe Card Library, circa 1971. She was going to toss it, and I asked for it. She only used one or two recipes from the whole thing that I can recall, so it’s basically intact, including the index. (Maybe I’ll make it the subject of an upcoming blog post.) I also have another recipe card collection my mother started in the 80’s, as well as one I started in the late 1980’s. I have a couple of old books, but not *that* old. One from the 80’s, and most of the rest are after 1990 or so, starting with Martha Stewart’s books. Oh, wait–the GER has given me three old books from The Galloping Gourmet, circa late 1960’s, and one or two others. I’ve found a couple of my mother’s titles from the late 50’s and early 60’s on Etsy, and have them on my “watch” list. (I need a big enough house for all this.)
I also have a recipe book from Entergy, who sent it to their customers for free in the 90’s with hundreds of old recipes from Louisiana Power & Light, the utility company they bought. (It just showed up in the mail one day.)Â Those recipes came from back in the day when “home economist” was an actual job. Nobody in the 90’s tested any of them, so there was no guarantee on how well they would turn out with modern appliances. But flipping through it, there is a recipe called Tomato Soup Cake. I kid you not. Starts out with a boxed mix, you add eggs and a few other things, and a can of condensed tomato soup. UGH. No, I wouldn’t try that on people I hated. Oh, wait a minute. . . .
One of my intrepid Facebook friends from Canada posted something from a website called Vintage Recipe Cards. It’s a website dedicated to showcasing the kind of foods that you used to find in magazines, cookbooks and those infamous card collections: Take a look at this gourmet abomination from the 1950’s:

The Frankaroni Loaf! Isn’t it just yummy?
Aren’t you just anxious to make this recipe for your next dinner party? You can–and here’s the recipe for it. If you make this culinary atrocity, do post in the comments and let us know how it turned out.
And after Thanksgiving, or anytime you want the tastes of Turkey Day, here’s a Sweet Potato-Turkey Pie that will fit the bill. . .and make you forget all about Thanksgiving for another six months. (It includes a can of the disgusting cream of mushroom soup, if you’re interested.)
EEEEEEWWWWWW. . .and there are lots more of these delectable detestables where those came from, just get to the website. The comments alone are hilarious, but a number of people have actually tried these edible train wrecks and love them. Like this classic, um, well. . . .

Yummy! (Not.) Source: VintageRecipeCards.com
One commenter on the Ham And Bananas Hollandaise page says that he made his own Hollandaise instead of the packaged stuff, and it’s delicious. Takes some guts to make this retro cookery, but like I’ve been told on a number of occasions, don’t knock it until you try it.
No, I’m not trying that one. Nor anything in a Jell-O mold or anything called “Aspic.” You try it and tell us all about it.
I showed you that not only to amuse (or nauseate), but also to show how far we’ve come as a nation and a people in regards to cooking, cookbooks, and everyday life. I’m sure every good housewife in the Mad Men era made Frankaroni Loaf and Jell-o molds of all kinds. (I had to eat that stuff only on occasion; thankfully, my mom wasn’t into this kind of, um, “artistry.”)Â But today, we have cookbooks from a myriad of sources, as well as an incredible array of new appliances, tools and gadgets that make cooking better, easier, healthier, and in many cases, faster.
We don’t have to suffer through these artistic disasters anymore.
Several new cookbooks by famous folks have come out recently, (with saner recipes) and a few months ago, I decided to pop for Giada de Laurentiis’ Happy Cooking: Make Every Meal Count. . .Without Stressing Out. Marked down 30% at Target, I figured it was a good time to get it. (It’s not autographed like my previous Giada books.) It’s all about good, tasty and healthy food, and “practical solutions” for daily life.
If you saw my recent very long popcorn post, you saw one of the recipes from this book, for Warm & Spicy Popcorn. It’s good, and with the fresh parsley from the back patio, it’s just delicious. But popcorn isn’t the only good recipe in this book. There are actually four popcorn recipes, one of which, I kid you not, is Pumpkin Spice Latte Popcorn. After you pop the popcorn, you mix together 3 tablespoons melted unsalted butter, 1 tablespoon of light brown sugar, a teaspoon of pumpkin pie spice, and a teaspoon of instant espresso powder, then drizzle it on the popcorn. Is it good? Of course it is, it’s got sugar in it. . .maybe I’ll try it in the fall.
Much like her prior book, Giada’s Feel Good Food, this book includes a lot of healthy recipes of all kinds, as well as advice. Many of the recipes came from her weekly digital magazine Giada Weekly, but others are some that, I suppose, Giada started making out of necessity. (She’s now a single mother and a restaurateur, as well as a cooking show star.) There are 10 chapters, including one on “clean eating,” but making sure it’s tasty, too. Of course, there’s also a chapter on pasta–what did you expect, it’s Giada! But she also acknowledges that while pasta can be part of a healthy diet, there are a lot of folks who need alternatives to pasta, like Trader Joe’s Brown Rice & Quinoa fusilli pasta, which is fantastic and $2.99 for a one-pound bag. (If you can get to a Trader Joe’s.)
Giada mentions too that in Italy, they cook just a small amount of pasta, rather than the whole box as Americans tend to do. It doesn’t mean the gluten-intolerant can still have it, but it does mean that cutting down on the amount of pasta in a dish might be better, even if it’s gluten free pasta. And what to do with the “ends” of several boxes or bags (page 116)? Boil then all together and make soup, toss it with some leftovers, or just toss in some pesto and have it like that. I’ve told you what my favorite is, that I have when I get some of that GF fusilli pasta from Trader Joe’s–about a cup of pasta, boiled in salted water, drained, and tossed with some real butter and a shake or two of Parmesan cheese. Yes, from the green bottle. Don’t need nothing else on it. But that’s not too often.
Giada’s book also has indicators for gluten free, vegetarian and vegan, so you can see at a glance if it’s a good recipe for you to try.
The #breakfast chapter (yes, it’s hash-tagged in the book) starts out with smoothies, something called “Nutella Milk” made in a blender, (I seriously must try that one day), a granola recipe that is *not* gluten free, and a recipe for one thing that actually *is* popular in the culinary arena, “Overnight Oats.” (I haven’t tried that yet either, from this book or from Pinterest.) With chia seeds, almond milk, and just a tablespoon of real maple syrup, it looks pretty good.
Remember when I mentioned that “bowls” are a thing now? Giada steps up to the, um, bowl, with something called American Breakfast Rice Bowl. It starts out with 3/4 cup of cooked rice, and has a lot more ingredients before you get to eat it. This is obviously a weekend breakfast–for one person–like my favorite 4-ingredient Corsican Omelette from Nigella Lawson. Much as I’d like to try it one day (probably with quinoa instead of brown rice), it’s not something for a hurried weekday breakfast. There are also some “toasts” (also a thing now), a couple of frittatas and strata using eggs, a tofu scramble (no thanks) and a selection of waffles/pancakes/muffins for the die-hard baker. (Polenta waffles for brunch, but not GF.)
There is a chapter dedicated to Snacks & Small Plates, which is where that delicious popcorn recipe is, as well as something called Mediterranean Chile Chicken Wings. I haven’t tried this yet, but I might one of these days. (Maybe in the slow cooker, or maybe the toaster oven.) It does contain harissa, which I learned how to make when I dove into the Martha Stewart book Clean Slate last year. It’s one of three chicken wing recipes, which, if you’re familiar, you know can be addictive. I made some for New Year’s Eve many years ago when I lived in the GER’s place from one of Suzanne Somers’ books. Well, nobody complained, and they’re all still alive. . . .
There are other appetizers (“apps”), such as meatballs, arancini, shrimp, crostini (little tiny “toasts,” really), as well as bean dip, Pico de Gallo, and other party standards.
The chapter on salad offers The Only Vinaigrette You’ll Ever Need, which does require fresh thyme leaves, agave syrup, and a shallot, among other things. I should have made some of this yesterday for the lettuce I harvested out of the garden. Well, if it continues to grow, I’ll have some (if the snails and possums let me have some, that is.)
Finally, Giada gets it, and she’s learned to use and enjoy the slow cooker. On page 104, she talks about the benefits of using one, and includes several recipes in the book. (Think she was reading my blogs?) Really, I can’t say enough good about the slow cookers, and I had both of mine going all weekend. Hazelnut Beef With Noodles (page 200) looks interesting, but I can do without the panko bread crumbs.
The chapter on eating clean contains recipes like a detox soup (Giada says she tolerates it better than cold, raw juices) and a bone broth. The new trend of “spiraled veg” gets a note on page 151, where Giada makes spaghetti out of zucchini and a tomato sauce. There are some baked fish and chicken recipes, some vegetarian fare and one treat I want to try one day: the Superfood Fudge Torte on page 160. It’s made with some surprising ingredients and sweetened with agave syrup. No black beans or avocado, but pretty good stuff, and it’s chocolate. I’ll let you know how it turns out.
In the chapter called Weeknight Warriors, where the Hazelnut Beef With Noodles is located, Giada talks about lentils, and offers Lentil Salade Nicoise. Recently I gave you the recipe for Stewed Lentils & Tomatoes, a Barefoot Contessa dish that’s cooked for about an hour. But Giada contends that lentils just can’t get any respect, and in the US, they’re primarily used in recipes like that one. In this vinaigrette-dressed salad, lentils are joined by hard-boiled eggs, baby potatoes, grape tomatoes, black olives and cucumber to make a rich and tasty fare that’s good any time of year. As easy to cook as white rice or quinoa, they can be added to pastas, salads, mixed with grilled veg for a sandwich or pureed into a dip. How come we don’t do that?
Rounding out the everyday chapters is one on vegetables and sides, with all manner of dishes you’ve probably never seen before. If you think you don’t like cauliflower, roasting it gets rid of the chalky taste. On page 209 is a recipe for Roasted Cauliflower with Capers and Almonds. That sounds good, doesn’t it? On the next page is a recipe for Salt Raosted Sweet Potatoes, which sees them topped with a seasoned yogurt sauce. (I still like my sweet potato fries, though.) Lemon Roasted Fennel, page 212, looks pretty tasty, but if you’ve bought fennel, you know that’s for a special occasion–it’s a bit pricey.
Giada’s chapter on Weekends & Holidays is the longer-cooking kinds of recipes, like pot roast, chicken, meatloaf, and, for Thanksgiving, turkey! (There’s even a recipe for a Monte Cristo Sandwich using up Thanksgiving leftovers.)Â On page 254 is a beef tenderloin recipe using a compound butter made with dry red wine, a fresh rosemary sprig, salt and a stick of butter. This one is a bit more complicated than mine–the wine and rosemary are heated, then boiled until the wine reduces way down. When it cools, you discard the rosemary, then mix the butter and salt in the food processor. Once that’s mixed a bit, you pour in the wine and process until smooth.
The last chapter is, of course, sweet stuff, something Giada wouldn’t be without. From Key Lime Panna Cotta and Limoncello Parfaits to Chocolate Cake Tiramisu with Chocolate Zabaglione, plus a section on treats to make for gifts, the sweet tooth will certainly be happy with whatever you try. Chocolate Dessert Salami? Don’t go starting your new diet until you’re done with this one. How does Eton Mess Semifreddo sound? Giada hasn’t forgotten about folks with furbabies–Peanut Butter Dog Bone Treats will let your doggie friends know you care, just find a bone cookie cutter before you start making them. (Just wish it didn’t call for whole wheat flour, but that’s just me.)
While there’s no one authority on whatever we call “healthy eating,” this book, like Giada’s Feel Good Food and Clean Slate before it, is a good place to start. Healthy, natural food should taste good, and Giada knows just how to do that, with some “happy” food thrown in.
Enjoy!
Happy Friday, Dear Readers:
I’m sorry I’m late finishing this post. I did *not* float away or become waterlogged this week; that was the north side of town, where they took a month’s worth of rain in an hour. You’ve probably seen the pictures of people rescuing terrified horses through several feet of water, a confused armadillo, some dogs, as well as people being pulled from their cars. I’m on the south side of this huge metropolis, where we had that kind of water last May. Twice.
Good thing that adorable baby tiger found wandering in Conroe, also north of Houston, wasn’t in my neighborhood. I might not give it up. . .until it reaches 100 pounds or so. (I love tigers.)
The garden has been enjoying all the rain, but I do need to get out and do some tidying up soon.
I also have been otherwise occupied this week, as well as not feeling up to any task. I didn’t attend last night’s gardening lecture at our local library, and missed seeing Miss Shirley again. If you’re reading this, Miss Shirley, my apologies–I just wasn’t up to going anywhere.
I’m sure all of you have heard by now that the musician Prince passed away yesterday at the age of 57. Like David Bowie a few months ago, fans are downloading his music from iTunes as fast as they can. I haven’t followed him in a long time, and the last new song I heard by him was called Black Sweat, in about 2006, I think. I got it from iTunes a few years ago, and it’s one of those wild, weird fun songs he was known for. I pulled out my copy of The Hits/The B-Sides that I haven’t listened to in a very long time, and will put some of them on my iPod to listen to.
So what’s going on in food?
Remember when I discovered Epic Bars a couple of years ago? I was in a shooting range in League City. No kidding. Guess what? You’ll be seeing more eateries in retail establishments starting this year, and it’s not just Epic bars. This article on SmartBlogs discusses retail eateries in the age of online shopping, and the revival of things like the old Woolworth’s lunch counters. Pasta consumption is down, and chefs are now doing the Spiralizer thing with veggies, something I haven’t tried yet.
It’s all in the Baum + Whiteman’s 2016 forecast. Increases in “clean” eating, dishes, and boasting about ingredient lists also figure in the paper. One buzzword this year is falafel–but you heard that word *last* year, right here, when I showed you how to make Waffled Falafel. Maybe 2017 will be the Year of the Waffle.
I’ve also read (elsewhere) that old-time soda fountains are making a comeback, but with a modern slant. Modern flavors like guava are added to what used to be a simple drink. Look for this to be the next “gourmet coffee,” where you order a custom-mixed non-alcoholic drink. I haven’t seen any of these in Houston, but if I find one (or more), you’ll read about it here.
Now, I’ve written frequently about gluten-free, sugar-free, and healthier versions of favorite foods. This one is apparently “sweeping the Internet,” so they say, and it’s all over Pinterest (but somehow escaped my detection.)Â I’m a bit late to the game, but if you’ve never heard of Cloud Bread, I’m going to give you a primer, and show you how to make it yourself at home. And, let’s face it, anyone who loves bread is always wishing they could have it, right? So here we go.
I happened across this article in the Daily Mail recently, a London-based tabloid that has some pretty interesting articles from time to time (not to mention more real news than most US-based news organizations.) Of course, their writing can be pretty bad, which makes me think it’s outsourced, but that’s another matter.
Cloud Bread is made similar to a pancake recipe I used back in the 80’s in Sharon Claessens’ Lose Weight Naturally Cookbook. It was a pretty good book for the time. The pancakes I loved to make involved whipped egg whites, then mixing the yolks with cottage cheese (eek!) and a few other ingredients (I don’t remember if wheat flour was involved.)Â They cook up like regular pancakes, but were described as “light little souffles.”
Darnit, now I wish I had my copy of it. Oh, well. . .I can buy it again one day. (Soon as I buy a house with a big enough study in it.) Many of these recipes had things like whole wheat flour in them, but it was the 80’s. Still, I remember them being mostly pretty good.
Finally, I made some. Verdict: not bad, good recipe to make all the time, if you can keep cream cheese around. I can’t, I keep nibbling on it. If I keep buying it, maybe I’ll get sick of it and just keep one or two in the fridge. I followed the basic recipe of 3 eggs, separated, 3 tablespoons of cream cheese, a quarter-teaspoon of cream of tartar (some suggest baking soda) and a packet of sweetener.
So, what do you do when you want to make this bread? You hit the grocery and buy eggs and cream cheese:

The setup
Separate the eggs, carefully:

Yolks and whites need to be completely separated.
Then add a packet of sweetener, if desired, to the yolks:
Next up, three tablespoons of room-temperature, soft cream cheese are mixed into the egg yolks:

3 tablespoons of cream cheese
Right into the bowl:

Cream cheese. . .so delicious.
Mix well:
And set it aside. Next up, wash the beaters VERY clean and VERY dry. You’ll be whipping egg whites next. (You can also whip the egg whites first.) If your bowl and beaters are not absolutely clean, or have even a speck of yolk or fat, they will not whip at all. (I *was* paying attention to all those Martha Stewart shows.)
First, add the cream of tartar to the egg whites:
And whip like you would any meringue-like recipe:
Whip all the way until you get the stiffest peaks you can get.
Once that’s done, you mix the yolk mixture into the beaten egg whites:
Mix carefully so you don’t deflate the egg whites. It should look like this:
Next, take a parchment-lined baking sheet, (or spray with non-stick spray) and use the batter to make rounds:
They won’t spread out when baking like cookies will, so what you see is what you get with these babies. Bake for whatever time your recipe says (mine was 300F for 30 minutes) and they come out like this:

Cloud Bread, a bit over-baked but still good.
They’re not “tasty” on their own, but they do taste good. I just spread soft cream cheese on the first few I ate. Will they make a sandwich? If you’re careful. I’ve also toasted them in the toaster oven, and they came out a bit crumbly, but I’ve not not tried a standup toaster (because I don’t have one, actually.) My thinking is if you’re going to take them for lunch, wrap everything separately, and make the sandwich when you are ready to eat it. On Momables, she gives instructions on how to use them for kids’ lunches.
This video shows you exactly how to make these rounds.
In this DM article, one of the paper’s writers actually tries the recipe–and bungles it. Here’s where the writer messed up: she added agave syrup to the mixture. It’s fine as is–introducing more liquid into whipped egg whites does what? Flatten them. It’s extra weight and extra moisture, since agave syrup is heavy like honey. Big DUH–the young blonde girl didn’t think. Adding anything that brings in extra weight or moisture will mess the whole thing up. Wait until they’re baked and make a sandwich with them.
One comment from the Daily Mail’s article: “it’s NOT a new invention. . .it’s a lift of a recipe from a diabetics cookbook from before they had insulin…” What your grandma told you is true: everything old is new again, isn’t it?Â
This is the recipe from Momables:
http://www.momables.com/grain-free-cloud-bread-recipe/
There’s also this article from Yahoo, and this one from Woman’s Day. Apparently Cloud Bread is “the next trend taking over Pinterest.” Yeah, well, I want to know why all the Pinterest folks haven’t yet figured out how to add grapes to the Crock Pot and have it turn into red wine, OK?
Checking out Pinterest, I’ve also seen pizza and breakfast sandwiches made with Cloud Bread, but I haven’t gotten as far as trying them all out. Mostly, it’s a case of Amy wanting to have her cake and eat it too. You can–go look on Pinterest!
Now I wonder–will it waffle? That was the other delay, I was going to make a breakfast sandwich with eggs and bacon and the like and see how it waffled. Well. . .I haven’t gotten around to it yet, OK? If I do, I’ll let you know.
But honestly, I thought they were pretty darn good, and even if you’re not doing low-carb, diabetic, grain free eating, these wouldn’t be a bad little addition to your cooking routine for a quick bread and something different. And all you need is some cream cheese on your grocery list to make it.
Enjoy!